Cracked 5 … April 20th, 2019

 


Jonathots Daily Blog

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Cracked 5

Complaints from the Easter Bunny

A.  Side profile for candy pose is not flattering

 

B.  Children think rabbits lay colored eggs

 

C.  Colored eggs insist on being called “Chicken-born Americans”

 

D.  Suing hip-hop music for stealing “hop” from “hoppity”

 

E.  Dying on the cross for the sins of mankind

  

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Sit Down Comedy … April 19th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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It happened two weeks ago.

I yelled at somebody when I should have chatted. I judged instead of questioned him. I attacked instead of approached.

I Could Spin It

I can tell you a thousand reasons why I did. I could even spin it so you would be on my side. Yet at the end of that exertion, you would be deceived, and I would still be wrong. I was overwrought.

I didn’t need a hammer when a toothpick would have been just as effective. It wasn’t necessary to scorch the Earth when no fire was required.

I did it because I could.

I was offended and I wanted to make sure the person who offended me felt as small and insignificant as possible.

Following this indiscretion, I was briefly tempted to be self-righteous. But there is a seed inside me which has grown into a full, blooming Tree of Life, which will not allow me to hide my motivations or make excuses for my iniquity.

Understand, there’s nothing special about me.

I’m an average person—not particularly a great guy. Just a dude.

Yet I found it intolerable to live with my bratty behavior. It bugged the hell out of me and the heaven into me. I had to make it right.

I didn’t want to.

My position, my prowess and my pride screamed that this one little breach of propriety was nothing, and I had a large enough resume that I should be forgiven no matter what.

This is the bullshit that shows up right after the bull does its dance—and the dancing bull always believes he’s right because he’s powerful. So he figures that where he shits shouldn’t matter. Everybody knows he’s a bull anyway.

Where is the Bonfire of Sanity?

I don’t want to live that way. I’ve never wanted to live that way. And since I’m just a “God-loves-me-anyway-piece-of-shit,” it tears at my soul that we live in a nation in which we can’t find two decent people to rub together to ignite the bonfire of sanity.

Our Attorney General has been thrust into an impossible situation—but still squeaks like a mouse.

The Democratic Party seems to be disappointed that there isn’t more filth to parade in front of the American people.

And our President is proud that his lame-brain ideas were not enacted by his staff and is taking a bow for being protected from his pending bloopers.

Is there anyone who could be just as contrite, torn-apart and upset as I am? I, who am the “me”—who am not much of anything?

On a normal day I would say that I am the chief of sinners, but I keep getting voted out of the position as the Tribal Council brings worse candidates forward for consideration.

Is there anyone who will join me in saying that there will be no justice until we finally confess the injustice in all of us?

Is the search for power so intoxicating that our consciences are rendered powerless?

I am tired of watching people who should be more intelligent, more forward-thinking, and more qualified than me act worse than I do. How could anybody find a lower position of character than I often portray?

Yet they do.

America Needs to be Cleansed from All Unrighteousness

But according to tradition, God is only faithful and just to do that once we’re willing to confess our sins.

 


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3 Things … April 18th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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That Are Required to Be a Follower of Jesus

1.   Love your neighbor as yourself

2.   Knowing what is God’s business and what is the province of the government

3.   Carrying a cross you never have to use


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Drawing Attention … April 17th, 2019

 Jonathots Daily Blog

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Babies Having Babies

(tap the picture to see the video)

art by smarrttie pants

Music performed by Elizabeth Cring


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Published in: on April 17, 2019 at 8:42 pm  Leave a Comment  
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The K Word … April 16th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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THE

Related image

WORD


I lived in Nashville, Tennessee for nearly twenty years. Overall, I found it a very pleasant experience.

Yet seventy-four miles south of my home, on Interstate 65, was a town called Pulaski. It is the community where the Ku Klux Klan began. So most assuredly, confidently and sadly, I will tell you today’s word that should never be used again—the “K” that should not be spoken—is the Ku Klux Klan.

The K Word is the Ku Klux Klan

It’s not so much their views. I don’t agree with anything they say. Yet if they were coming from a position of personal experience, I might need to consider their perspective. But no member of the KKK has spent fifteen years playing in the National Football League, surrounded by black men. If they had done this and come out with a negative insight, then I would have to conclude that they had a right to their opinion.

Or if some of the members had lived in Israel for ten years and after the visitation, had stated that Jews were greedy and less than human, I might question their premise but certainly would have to acknowledge that they had been involved in a live-in experiment.

But there’s no member of the Ku Klux Klan who has spent any time with members of the black race or the Jews. They are not well-traveled individuals who, after careful research, developed a doctrine of the division among the races, with the hypothesis being that “white people are better.”

These are little boys and girls who were never allowed to formulate their own thinking but instead, absorbed the prejudice, anger and fallacious notions of their ancestors.

Unfortunately, these ancestors came to the conclusion that keeping their cotton crop in the black was much more important than the blacks who made it possible for them to have a cotton crop in the first place.

They are childishly ignorant—ignorant because the philosophy they cling to was long ago abandoned by people of reason, science and emotional well-being; childish because they’re still trying to please parental figures, aunts, uncles, grandfathers and ancient kin who held to a belief system that found its only power by leaving others powerless.

There is a school of thought that if you want to do away with the Ku Klux Klan, then let them speak their mind, let them be heard, and they will be revealed for who and what they are.

Unfortunately, unfoldings in our country over the past ten years tell us that giving breath to a murderer is granting license to murder.

This is why I’m saying the KKK should never be mentioned. It should not be discussed. It should not evoke either anger or apathy.

We should pretend that it does not exist until it’s so small that evolution can swallow it back into the earth—where it will finally die—with the graves of those who were once so presumptuous.


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1 Thing You Can Do This Week To Resurrect Your Life

Publicly Crucify Your Sins

Although your instincts may be to duck away, hide your faults or come up with an explanation to excuse your errors, the human race around you is geared to dig up unseen naughtiness, exploit it and make the doer of such deeds look not only evil, but treacherous for trying to disguise the actions.

It’s been proven throughout history.

Those Who Confess Fare Better

Those who confess their sins before they’re forced to do so always fare better than the hapless shysters who attempt to use legal means or clever methods to get an adjusted verdict from the court of public opinion.

Without trying to be controversial, I will go so far as to tell you that if Adolf Hitler, arguably the most sinister sinner of all time, had realized that he was losing the war, negotiated peace and tearfully articulated the darkness and foolishness of killing the Jews, he would have certainly been punished severely—maybe even had his life taken—but still would have been granted a bit of human grace.

It is ironic that we teach diversion and lying while simultaneously tracking down those who use such practices like we are on the hunt and they are the foxes.

Have your own resurrection this year.

Come clean

Hang yourself up on the cross for a brief time, so that your decision to recant ignorant ways can be acknowledged by the masses, your old ass can be buried, and you can rise to new life.


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