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Chill out.
It’s probably the best advice that can be given to the new crop of parents running around in a tizzy, trying to invent the best way to care for their offspring. You can play them music and you can read them books, but children absorb the energy of the environment rather than the good intentions of their parental units. In other words, if your kids think you’re frantic, they will imitate frantic– while using your frantic against you.
Children are simple. Jesus said they’re like heaven. They are not born looking male or female (matter of fact, you have to remove a diaper sometimes to be sure). Their needs are practical: eat, drink, be cleaned and cuddled. And they don’t arrive with any particular batch of beliefs or array of prejudices.
Also, they certainly do not have personalities. I know many parents will disagree with that, insisting their child is riddled with facial expressions and gestures that connote a style of behavior. But it’s really not so. They are a glob of goo, ready to go. What they become is what they acquire by noticing what creates the most attention in their surroundings. If you treat them correctly, with a balance of love, respect and discipline, they can be a most delightful experiences—emotionally, spiritually mentally and physically. If you become hectic, nervous, worried, frustrated and overly concerned, they can turn into little hellions that attempt to control your life by pushing all your buttons.
We should take advantage of the fact that children, from birth to age twelve, whether male or female, are basically equal. At this age, girls are not stronger than boys, boys don’t run faster than girls and really, even their bodies are similar. We like to clump them into “pinks” and “blues,” but they’re not really color coded. I will tell you, if you only put trucks and army men in a room for a girl to play with, she will enjoy herself. And young boys have their dolls—they’re called action figures and GI Joe.
It is a precious time—a season when we are allowed to pour our energy and convictions into these young souls—or poison them with our insecurities and misgivings. It is a time when men and women are truly equal. No wonder Jesus called it “the kingdom of heaven.”
To make sure that you do not taint this chilled-hood, when boys and girls are living in total eyeball-to-eyeball peacefulness with each other, we should focus on three things: value, values and valuable.
1. Value. There are only two of these that should be shared with any young child. They are the two ongoing truths in our earth journey that work no matter if you’re in New Jersey or New Guinea.
(a) People are the only important thing, and the only way to reach the heart of God and receive His grace is to treat them well. You can pass along prejudice to a child by merely teaching him to pity other folks. I don’t pity anyone. I love them and if pity is needed, I will leave that to God.
(b) Honesty. After your children understand that people are to be treated with dignity, then you need to teach them to handle themselves with honesty. That’s right. Instruct children to count the cost. Truly evaluate themselves on what they’re able to do without shame, and then find their goal–and then not stop until they hit the finish line. Those are the only two pieces of value that need to be instilled in children to make them successful and overcomers. Everything else is banners, tinsel, decorations and streamers.
2. Values. After you teach your chilled-hood what is of value, then go ahead and let them know what your values are. And please, don’t make it a long list. Ten commandments are nine too many. Seven virtues of the successful person is over-wrought by six. Keep it to one. Here is the only value you need to teach your children: No one is better than anyone else. Teach it well, because they won’t hear it anywhere other than their home. Society is a cacophony of voices screaming “equality,” while whispering, in back rooms, “bigotry.” Your chilled-hood needs to know that you really believe that you’re not better than anyone else. It will cause them to be viable to the world around them instead of part of the problem.
3. And finally, valuable. Don’t give your children money; don’t give your children gifts. Teach them that the world functions on the basis of work and pay. Have chores, duties, goals and aspirations for them to achieve, and when they complete them, give them coupons that are good for purchasing their toys, movies and special events. Free yourself of the ridiculous notion that unconditional love is giving away the blessings of life to ungrateful people. Your children will grow up to be solid human beings, free of prejudice and with a great work ethic–as long as they understand that toys are a by-product of work. All you have to do is tally up how much you plan to spend for movie tickets, games, gifts and special occasions over a given month, and when your children enact the plan of the family, give them coupons that enable them to purchase these benefits. Money will make them greedy. Receiving gifts causes them to feel entitled. But if they sense they’re in control of their own destiny concerning their pleasures, it will build them up and make them excited about the journey that lies ahead. They will also appreciate what goes into making a dollar available.
If we would stop hovering over our children, fearing their next move, and instead use their chilled nature–the equality that exists between boys and girls–to foster value, values and the knowledge of what is valuable, we might be able to avoid some of the disaster that occurs as they move into the dark ages of their existence.
Yes, because after age twelve comes a frightening season when the human being temporarily seems to be unreachable by normal methods. This is referred to as adolescence. But if you don’t mind, I’ve renamed it.
I call it … addled-essence.
See you tomorrow.
.
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Listen to Jonathan sing his gospel/blues anthem, Spent This Time, accompanied by Janet Clazzy on the WX-5 Wind Machine
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Below is the first chapter of Jonathan Richard Cring’s stunning novel entitled Preparing a Place for Myself—the story of a journey after death. It is a delicious blend of theology and science fiction that will inspire and entertain. I thought you might enjoy reading it. After you do, if you would like to read the book in its entirety, please click on the link below and go to our tour store. The book is being offered at the special price of $4.99 plus $3.99 shipping–a total of $8.98. Enjoy.
http://www.janethan.com/tour_store.htm
Sitting One
I died today.
I didn’t expect it to happen. Then again, I did—well, not really.
No, I certainly didn’t expect it.
I’ve had moments of clarity in my life. Amazingly enough, many of them were in the midst of a dream. For a brief second I would know the meaning of life or the missing treatment to cure cancer. And then as quickly as it popped into my mind it was gone. I really don’t recollect dying. Just this unbelievable sense of clear headedness—like walking into a room newly painted and knowing by the odor and brightness that the color on the wall is so splattering new that you should be careful not to touch it for fear of smearing the design. The greatest revelation of all?
Twenty-five miles in the sky time ceases to exist.
The planet Pluto takes two hundred and forty-eight years to circle the sun. It doesn’t give a damn.
The day of my death was the day I became free of the only burden I really ever had. TIME.
Useless.
Time is fussy. Time is worry.
Time is fear. Time is the culprit causing human-types to recoil from pending generosity.
There just was never enough time.
Time would not allow it. Remember—“if time permits …”
Why if time permits? Why not if I permit? Why not if I dream? Why not if I want? Why does time get to dictate to me my passage?
It was time that robbed me of my soulful nature. It was time that convinced me that my selfishness was needed.
I didn’t die. The clock in me died, leaving spirit to tick on.
So why don’t we see the farce of time? Why do we allow ourselves to fall under the power of the cruel despot? Yes, time is a relentless master—very little wage for much demand.
I died today.
Actually … a piece of time named after me was cast away.
Jonathots Daily Blog 