I’m Looking For… A Cool Cat January 31, 2013

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I don’t like cats.

I find them to be finicky, fussy–portraying great promise, with very little evidence of actual worth.

I grew up with them. My mother loved cats. There were always at least three or four hanging around our house. A case could be made that I’ve overdosed on the furballs, but the truth is I’ve just gotten to know them so well that I no longer find their peculiarities to be cute, but rather, obnoxious and arrogant.

They don’t really like people. Now, I’m sure your pet cat is the exception to the rule, but if you’ll allow me to analyze the species as a whole without feeling that I’m attacking Muffin, here are the things about cats that I don’t like:

1. They use people when they need them and discard them at will.
2. It is necessary to de-claw them because their jungle instincts come out only in disdain for your furniture.
3. They never love when you need love, only when their psyche personally requires it.
4. They leave the house and kill birds–actually, an estimated three and a half billion last year.
5. They don’t make eye contact. They walk at a distance from you, looking askance.
6. They don’t come when you call them. They interpret this as independence when it is actually overwrought self-worth.
7. They will occasionally just walk out of the house to never return, leaving no note behind explaining their departure.

Please understand–I think cats have a greater potential in physiology and even attitude for FAR surpassing the dog in viability to the human family. They just don’t care. They are not interested in the propagation of our race or the whims and desires of our needs.

Cats aren’t cool.

So I am looking for a cool cat. Yes, I mean this in the sense of the feline, but also the “we-line.” Here are things I think would help make cats cooler:

1. Stop playing so hard to get. They may refer to you as a Persian cat, but it doesn’t mean you’re royalty.
2. Be grateful that somebody’s calling you, and walk across the room to respond to their beckoning.
3. Never scowl or spat at those around you, even when they come up behind and surprise.
4. Bury your crap a little deeper in the litter and stop being offended because people are not impressed with the residue of your stinky.
5. Stop disdaining the dogs around you and realize that you’re not better just because you’re a cat.
6. Enjoy the food set before you, even if it’s not presented in a fancy glass dish and garnished with a bit of parsley.
7. Maintain the dignity of your claws–just don’t use them on people you love or the things they own.

There you go. Today, I feel like I have rebuilt the cat–and in the process, maybe I, myself, can learn to avoid the choice of being a lap dog … by learning how to be a cool cat.

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I’m Looking For… A Happy Millionaire January 30, 2013

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The question is certainly rhetorical: “Who wants to be a millionaire?“

It is assumed that there is a resounding chorus of “Me!’s” that follow the inquiry. Yet at the same time, in our poetry, music and theology, we insist that finance is completely incapable of making one happy. So are we to conclude from this that happiness is impossible? Or is it that misery is simply better when well-funded?

Because just as certain as we are that money cannot make you happy, we are even more intensely sure that poverty is a real road kill. So what is the answer?

I think it’s a little, simple process of self-discovery. The finance in your life should match your vision and mission.

I do not think that ministers, politicians and public servants should be wealthy. I think their means should match the surroundings of those they serve. Of course, I will not win many popularity contests espousing such controversial ideas. But I do believe there’s very little in life that’s worse than a prophet who profits too much–a politician who gets your vote AND your pocketbook, and someone who chooses to be of service to mankind but decides at the last minute to double-dip a hand into the till.

So is there ANYONE who should be allowed to be wealthy? The best wealthy people are those who don’t want to be–who work really hard to get rid of it. That’s the only time that you find millionaires who have sprouted a smile–not when they have bought their tenth vote or eighth luxury car, but instead, when they have purchased a Ford Escort for a struggling teacher in the community who has lost transportation to get to school to instruct young minds.

Happiness is the balance between solvency and emptiness.

How do we get there?

1. Understand the true value, worth and extent of your talent. The easiest path to envy and eventual insanity is to believe that you are better than you actually are.

2. To make sure that your evaluation on your talent is correct, do something every week to confirm and multiply your abilities.

3. Simplify your lifestyle and finance to the point that your talent can cover your expenses with enough to spare to make you feel that you are able to bless others.

4. Privately pursue a dream that might open doors to future possibilities but if it doesn’t happen, you’re completely content without it.

There you go.

• Millionaires fail to achieve happiness because money is the common commodity which grows the root of all evil.
• Poor people are equally dissatisfied because they feel cheated rather than accurately assessing their position in life and working within their means.

If I am able to grow one tomato, I should stay away from recipes that require two. It’s as simple as that.

So until I find a happy millionaire, I will think a million happy thoughts about where I am, who I am and where I’m going.

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Moved… January 29, 2013

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“It’s a scam!”

She was determined to inform me of my pending idiocy by interrupting a conversation I was having with a young father and his little daughter out in front of a Wal-Mart. The two of them had stopped me as I was exiting the establishment, explaining that they were without a home and needed some money for food.

The lady who had decided to interject her opinion into the situation glared at the pair begging for money and punctuated her warning by saying to the father, “Why don’t you get a job?”

Fortunately, she glided away on her magic carpet of self-righteousness. The little girl hung her head and the father rose to his feet as if he was going to follow. I held my hand up, motioning to him to stop.

“Now, where were we?” I said, calming their spirits.

Here’s the truth, my dear friends. I don’t care if it’s a scam.

I don’t care if the drunk on the street is getting a buck off of me to buy the cheapest Ripple in the local liquor store. I don’t care if the fellow with the elaborate story concerning his broken-down car, which needs a five dollar repair, is just a way to boost cash from me. The transactions which happen between human beings are not investments and therefore do not require brokers. It is not necessary for us to determine the validity of the need.

In this country we are continually stumping about the need for compassion. But you see, compassion is completely impossible if you’ve closed all the doors to your human heart which might allow you to be moved.

Americans do not lack compassion–we have just been trained to be cynical and are nearly incapable of being moved. Honestly, folks, if you’re not moved, you will never be able to tap the root of your compassion. Every day of my life is that pursuit — working very hard to unload the boxes of my burdens, prejudices, anger and frustration so that compassion can move freely through my human space.

I occasionally will purposely get up very early in the morning, before dawn, to see if I still have the tenderness to be moved by the rising sun.

I will sit in my van and listen to music that gentles my spirit to allow the tears to flow freely.

I practice being moved because without that training, I am vacant of compassion.

Here are two sentences I complete in every situation:

1. “If it were me…” Honestly I did not see a man and his young daughter in front of the store. No, I saw myself thirty-eight years ago, having just been evicted from an apartment and not knowing where to go, desperately needing someone to purchase a pint of blackberries I had picked, granting me a few quarters to buy bread and bologna. I recalled that sensation and it moved me. Candidly, I will never be moved by the plight of others unless I am able to insert myself into the situation.

2. “If I don’t…” In other words, if I don’t fill the gap, do I really think there is someone possessing more generosity than me, who will come along and help these people out with something other than useless advice about needful employment? I often realize I cannot trust my society to be compassionate. The burden is mine. So therefore I have deed and title to the blessing.

• If it were me…
• If I don’t…

Run those two through your mind before you carelessly walk away. You’ll stop worrying about whether things are scams and become more concerned about faltering over an opportunity to be truly human.

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Fifty-Two Days … January 28, 2013

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I got out my calculator and figured it out–one-seventh of a year.

I just spent one-seventh of a year situated in South Florida to spend Christmas with the family, record a new album and share in a whole bunch of Sunshine State churches before making my departure this morning.

People often talk about evaluating the success of a project or the fruitfulness of an endeavor. The only difficulty with that aspiration is that we can’t keep moving the goal post to accommodate the lack of achievement. (Actually, that may be the secret to bringing America out of its economic and spiritual doldrums–if we could just get people to admit that the present flow of finance and inspiration is lacking, we might become righteously disgruntled enough to DO something about our plight instead of rationalizing it.)

So as I drive up 27 N to take on another hunk of the Floridian countryside, I must ask myself what I thought I wanted to accomplish when I arrived in Ft. Lauderdale over seven weeks ago.  It really boiled down to four missions:

1. I wanted to enjoy my family.
2. I wanted to bless all the people I met.
3. I wanted to increase my productivity by recording an album and getting my video ready for touring in 2013.
4. And I wanted to make sure my children are growing in the faith, prospering and in good health, “even as their souls prosper.”

So even though it’s silly, I would like to take this morning to give myself a report card. Now, there is a good chance that I will grade myself too generously, but since I don’t have anybody else to come in and score my papers, we’ll just have to be satisfied with my ciphering.

Let’s look at #1–enjoying my family. I think I can give myself an A on that one. I am convinced that being a good father is the correct mixture of hands-off, hands-on and hand-outs. In other words, I want to give my children room to breathe and be themselves while simultaneously intervening when I see them racing toward the edge of a cliff–and never make them feel that if they hit a hard spot, they can’t ask for assistance. I hope they all feel that way. So thus far, so good.

Concerning blessing all the people I meet, this has become a heart’s desire and source of chilling excitement to my soul. At my lodging location during this period, I got to know the maintenance people, the maids and all of the staff–blessing them with a dollar or two from my wallet from time to time, letting them know I appreciate their contributions to my life and that I admire the work they pursue to make a living wage. I certainly could not do it.

I also tried to tenderize my heart even more towards all the congregational members, audiences and sponsors who were gracious enough to allow me a platform to air my thoughts. So I’m going to give myself a B+–mainly because we can always do better at doing better.

Now, concerning increasing my productivity, it was a smashing success, as I slid into my son’s recording studio, producing a new album, and with the assistance of my other son, put out the video of my show. Both the album and the video are now in my van, journeying with me. I really feel that I landed on a bit of inspiration and heavenly breath with both projects. It doesn’t cause me to be prideful, but certainly grateful for the spunk and initiative to bring God to life through art instead of just reading about Him in a book. So I’m going to make that grade an A+. (I’m a little embarrassed because it seems like I’m grading myself very generously. But it was a good 52 days.)

And now for the final step of assuring my own soul that those individuals who sprang from my lineage or have been introduced into it are finding power in their spiritual journey. I think I have to give myself a C- here. The world and the pressure to conform have taken some toll on my little conclave of family. Don’t misunderstand me–they’re beautiful people and I love them dearly, but they are living in a society that has convinced itself that it is cool and intellectual to deny the work of a universal Father. It doesn’t sadden me so much as it makes me realize that they’ve increased the difficulty in their lives by journeying without a map, compass or co-pilot. I think most of them still believe in God–they have just bought in a little bit to the social lethargy which feels snooty by ignoring a divine goodness.

I know they will not like hearing me say this, but I do believe it’s my duty after fifty-two days to warn my friends that the popularity of the moment is never the lasting virtue of the future. God has not gone away. He is often disguised by religion, which wishes to profit from His image more than seeing the world enriched by His wisdom. He’s been nearly mutilated by politics, which has attempted to turn the Almighty into a poster child for everything from abortion to gun advocacy. And He has been locked up in a black leather-bound book, which is so vulnerable in establishing the weaknesses in its heroes and characters that it falls prey to the cynic.

So as I drive on today with my A, B+, A+ and C-, I realize that I have once again ended up where I have often found myself in life–B.

I don’t know. Perhaps maybe I am doomed to be a B movie for eternity. But at least, God has given me the sense of humor, ability to be honest about it while simultaneously refusing to give up–continuing to pray and believe that all things work together for the good.

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Fullness: Real … January 27, 2013

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Words come and go.

I remember when saying “groovy” really was groovy. Being declared “hip” was not a replacement for anything. And “far out” was actually the next-door neighbor to “cool.”

So if I can shake your memory to a time when the phrase “keep it real” was considered to be the groovy, hip, far-out, cool phrase of the day–I’m sorry to see that one go.

It wasn’t “BE real” or even “GET real,” but rather, doffed its tiny beanie of popularity to the fact that we have a job–to KEEP it real. It is really quite natural to do so if you understand all of your parts and instead of using them against one another, you form them into a team. After all, teaching human beings that we have a warring nature which is always trying to bring us down and keep us from our better selves may be the fad of the day, but it traps us in our inadequacies and fears instead of throwing us a rope to pull ourselves out of the pit of hell.

Let’s just take what we’ve learned over the past few days. (If you haven’t learned anything, let’s just take what I’ve said.) It begins with emotions–allowing ourselves to feel. We get the ball rolling by giving ourselves a permission slip to be touched by infirmities–both your own and others and admitting that we get tempted like everybody else. Is there anything more annoying than the wanker who always says, “I never feel that way…” or “Chocolate chip cookies? Ooh. They’re too sweet.” (Somehow or another, I think God just forgives us for silently plotting his death.) Everything begins with “feel.”

It is only then that we are prepared to kneel without being forced to do so or repeating what everybody is doing in a line at the altar. We kneel to worship. What do we worship? Spirit and truth. Candidly, there is much to consider spiritually which I will NEVER pursue because I just don’t find it of any earthly use. This may limit my after-life education, but I guess I don’t mind picking up a few extra classes in heaven, since I have all of eternity to complete my degree. Things that touch our soul should have spirit and truth. If they’re spiritual they’re going to be truthful; and if they’re truthful, you will find some spirituality in them.

So after we spend some time feeling and kneeling, we’re ready to move up to the penthouse, the human brain, and set in motion some healing. I don’t think I’m alone when I say that my upbringing, schooling and adolescence left behind some pretty huge mind-scars. I did get my mind blown several times–and not in a good way. I need some healing–or I will start thinking I know everything I need to know and cease to learn what will actually make me smarter and easier to get along with.

Unfortunately, as we discussed, our thinkers are not learning and our learners are not thinking. You get healed when you realize that the gray matter located in your cranium is not only supposed to think, pumping out what it knows, but also start learning what is being pumped out by what other people think.

What a great journey so far–we let ourselves feel instead of hiding behind bad moods, calling them “a poor night’s sleep.” We let ourselves kneel by taking spirit and truth into our lives as worship instead of grabbing off the fast food menu of religion with a crust of bread and a sip of wine. This allows us to renew our minds and gives that magnificent human computer the opportunity to think and learn, which heals us.

Then we’re ready to go out and deal with the world and DO AS: do the things we dream to do but perform them as if we were our own customer–give quality to our actions equivalent to our own standards. Then, instead of complaining about our lot, we deal with it. We realize that preparing is much more important than planning.

Having the right attitude when you show up makes it so much easier to change when your goals are rejected at the door. Suddenly we develop a reputation for being real. We start hearing folks say, “You’re just so real…” They tender stories us about individuals they know who are “so fake.” And all we’ve done to get this magnitude of appreciation is ask our little shift of workers, which show up at our human factory every day, to unite together in a common cause instead of pretending that each one of them owns the company.

• Feel
• Kneel
• Heal
• Deal
• And then, keep it real

You’ve reached the fullness.

There you go. Try it out and if it doesn’t work for you, realize that I’m just me. There is no money-back guarantee–because you didn’t give me any money. But if it does work, share it with somebody else and let’s see if we can’t free ourselves from the blandness that just seems to welcome insanity.

P.S.  Happy fourteenth birthday to my granddaughter, Isabella.

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Do As: Heal … January 26, 2013

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6:52 P.M. last night–eight minutes until show time in Lake Worth, Florida. Above you see a shot of the stage, which I am about to enter. What do I know?

First, if you don’t mind, let’s look at what I don’t know:

1. I don’t know if anyone will be out there, in the audience. I mean, the event has been advertised. We tried to stimulate interest with an intriguing press release. But the slightest little thing can come along and keep people from showing up to ANYTHING–even free turkey sandwiches passed out on the street.
2. I don’t know whether these folks are going to like me or not. I am not famous, so they feel complete freedom to reject me at will. “Reject” is a little strong, but you get the idea.
3. The best thing I possess is who I am, free of lies.
4. And finally, I don’t know if everything is going to work. The presumption of the status of all things being tuned and ready has often left me embarrassed, with my pants down emotionally.

So what do I feel eight minutes before the show? Invigorated, excited, careful, curious and humble. And here are the two things I know:  first, I need to walk out there and do what I do as well as I possibly can, without offering lame reasons for why I am not ready. Secondly, in pursuing what I do, if I am intelligent, I will perform my duties and mission as if I were doing it for myself. Yes, I always look out at the audience, viewing a sea of faces which all resemble me. I am not about to give folks less than what I would require for myself.

That’s why it’s important that I begin the process with feel–understanding that if I am not touched by the infirmities of life, admitting that I am tempted like everybody else, I can become a first-class jerk with no heart for mankind, just spouting a bunch a rules and pretending that I’m God‘s hall monitor.

Once I have purified feeling, I am ready to worship in spirit and truth–to symbolically kneel before my gathered host, letting them know that I honor the heavens so much that I’m trying to build a branch office here on earth.

Whenever I am in front of an audience, it’s helpful to be prepared not only to think, but to learn from them. In the process, healing occurs. Sometimes the healing is in them; occasionally it’s in me. But if I insist that I am the thinker and they’re the learners, they will quickly be repelled by my approach and protect themselves from the onslaught of my domineering attitude.

I am inclined to DO AS–to deal with what is going to happen and use it to my advantage instead of recoiling in fear because some unknown factor has surprised me. Yes, I will tell you good folks a simple truth: preparing is better than planning. Yes, preparing your heart, spirit and mind to feel, kneel and heal is ten times more effective than thinking you have covered every eventuality and closed the doors of difficulty.

Right now the stage is empty. In a minute, it will be occupied by the human-flesh spaces known as Jonathan Richard Cring and Janet Clazzy. We owe it to ourselves and those we are about to meet to feel, kneel, heal and finally–deal with what is available.

Are we ready? Have we made a plan? More importantly, are we prepared to be ourselves without shame?

Deal–the process by which we arrive in life with a pure heart, a truthful spirit, a healed mind, without any hidden agenda to control but instead, are grateful just for the opportunity to be alive and breathing deeply.

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Think and Learn: Heal … January 25, 2013

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The picture is that of a knee scab on my granddaughter, Lily’s, leg. She acquired the injury while running to the bus stop with her pet bulldog and the fine animal decided to become exuberant, joining her in the scamper, but instead, ended up tackling her like a Baltimore Raven linebacker.

That was two days ago. It is now healing. That’s what it’s supposed to do. That is what is being accomplished.

We are supposed to heal, too, you know. Healing in the human being happens in the mind. The truth of the matter is, you can get emotionally to the point that you’re feeling. You can find a good reason for kneeling, based upon spirit and truth and seeing God’s will done here on earth as it is in heaven. But the healing of our woes and most of our body’s aches and pains happens in the brain. The spirit has to be able to get up there and renew that cranium device. And God, don’t we resist it.

Matter of fact, it is a huge problem in our society. Our thinkers refuse to learn and our learners are devoid of thinking.

Yes, the people who are leaders in our country, who should be thinking up new ideas on how to get us out of our doldrums, do not have the ability to learn the new things that are necessary to keep their thinking fluid. The young folks in our country, who do accumulate new information, are not being taught how to take those bits and pieces of data and put them into practice in a thinking environment. So our thinkers don’t learn and our learners can’t think.

Nothing gets healed.

What you want in your life is a brain that can think, remembering all the experiences that are pertinent to your situation, but is equally pliable to learn every new piece of valuable input provided, to make the solution process more effective.

How do we get there? How do we get to a place where our brain sets healing into motion throughout our entire being?

After we learn to feel, being touched by infirmities and tempted by the various devices in life, and then we kneel in worship at the beauty of spirit and truth, we have gained the good cheer and common sense to blend thinking and learning.

If I am stuck with what I currently know for the rest of my life, I am limited. On the other hand, if I am always learning and never “coming to the knowledge of the truth,” I am equally as perplexed. Healing happens inside us when we combine what we think and know with what we learn and acquire. It is the perfect balance.

Once you feel, you have a reason to kneel. And once you kneel, you can heal those things that ail your mind–to walk in newness of life.

Think–yes, indeed. Use your brain. Conjure all the memories of past victories and the lessons from the defeats. But then, allow yourself to be renewed by learning everything available to you, receiving counsel and blending what you think with what you’ve learned, in order to generate your healing.

It is a powerful way to live. It is the only way to be healed.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity