Things I Learned from R. B. … August 23rd, 2020

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Episode 29

While I was waiting for a member of R. B.’s family to arrive, to assist in care and making decisions, I made a practice of visiting him once a day.

It was not easy.

He had convinced himself that I had placed him in this institution, and that it was I, and I alone, who had the power to release him.

The spread of the cancer had left him weak, sallow and embittered. It was difficult to ascertain what parts of his actions were real, what parts were brought on by drug interactions, and what portions that were conjured from the horrors of the disease itself.

“I thought you’d die first,” he said to me.

It became a recurring theme.

He looked at me and then at himself, and wondered why, with all of my obesity, I was still living and he, who was slender, was on the verge of demise.

He wanted to blame God.

But mostly he wanted to blame me.

Even though he felt that I had been generous to him, he insisted that I had withheld just enough to keep him from true success and happiness. He lamented following me all over the country and spoke disparagingly of our adventures.

I started to wonder why I was putting myself through this daily bombardment of accusations. But deep in my soul, however, I knew that at this present moment, I was all R. B. had.

However, it was a little too much for the other members of my family. To their credit, many of them were able to set aside some time to visit R. B. and listen to his ramblings, but no one was willing to take on the daily duty.

About a week after we put him into the lovely hospice, it was decided by the federal government that R. B. did not qualify for this particular home, so he was moved to a less expensive one down the road.

It had less of everything.

Even less hope.

R. B. was about ready to explode with anger—when family showed up from Rhode Island. It was just his younger brother, Johnny. Johnny was quite different from R. B. Johnny was glib, filled with stories, and fancied himself to be humorous. Johnny was curious.

R. B. was glad to see him, but Johnny did little to bolster the dying man’s will to live.

He joked about death.

He joked about how cheap R. B. was.

He even joked about the fact that he had pulled the short straw with their family—which was the only reason he had made the journey.

He did it all in a spirit of jest, and R. B. seemed to laugh along. Matter of fact, the arrival of Johnny was the best thing that had happened to R. B. for several months.

I stood back at a distance and remained supportive. Johnny jumped in, took over R. B.’s finances, living quarters and car. I was a trifle uncomfortable with some of it, but then rebuked myself since it really wasn’t my business.

Everything seemed to be going along pretty well until late one night, when I got a phone call from Johnny.

Sit Down Comedy … October 4th, 2019

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I don’t know if you knew this or not, but there are grown-ups and there are grown-downs. It’s rather simple:

Some people get older in an upward direction and other pilgrims use the passing of time to turn downwards.

You might ask yourself, how can you tell the difference?

1. You might just be a grown-down if you think you’re always busy.

 

2. You might be a grown-up if you consider something funny and laugh to yourself, while simultaneously knowing you can’t exactly share it out loud because the grown-downs would think you were immature.

 

3. You certainly could be a grown-down if you’re constantly finding reasons to avoid doing something that you’re pretty sure would be good but you think it makes you sound more mature if you mull over the choices and decide not to do them.

 

4. You might be a grown-up if you just keep your mouth shut if somebody actually has a good idea before you step forward and try to shoot bullets in it.

 

5. On the other hand, you could be a grown-down if you find yourself spending a lot of time sighing, crying, complaining and disapproving.

 

6. You might be a grown-up if you ignore the difficulty of the opportunities that pop up in front of you and instead, find ways to turn them into adventures in living and giving.

 

7. You really are a grown-down if you believe that politics has a chance of doing something great.

 

8. You might be a grown-up if you stop waiting for politics to solve your problems—and you, yourself, go out and do something great, or at least something that could pass for it.

 

9. You might be a grown-down if you’ve cast your allegiance to a political party.

 

10. You might be a grown-up if you’ve found a good path for yourself and demand that the political parties begin to follow you.

 

11. You might be a grown-down if you know all the diseases, conditions and allergies that just might afflict your young children.

 

12. Or maybe you’re a grown-up if you realize that those kids only remain healthy by being exposed to the life around them and developing immune systems.

 

13. You might be a grown-down if you take God real seriously and become somber whenever serving Him is brought into the conversation.

 

14. You might be a grown-up if you seriously take God into every part of your life and enjoy the hell out of Him.

 

15. You might be a grown-down if you believe that sex and romance are the same thing.

 

16. Welcome to the grown-up world when you realize that sex is for fun and romance is necessary for the heart.

 

17. You might be a grown-down if you’re too concerned about your health.

 

18. You might be a grown-up if you’ve discovered a healthy concern.

 

19. You might be a grown-down if you’re laughing less, arguing, fussing and objecting more.

 

20. You might be a grown-up if you learn to laugh over the limitations of your reasoning power.

Walking around in today’s world is similar to a mine field.

(No—that’s too dramatic.)

It’s more like strolling in a cow pasture, trying to avoid the bullshit.

(No—that’s too dark.)

Actually, it’s almost identical to walking into the room where your kids keep their toys, without your shoes on, in the dark. Because you know that somewhere, there’s something that’s not put away, and if you step on it, it’s gonna give you a nasty ouchy.

It’s kind of like what my friend, Vic, said about it:

Sometimes you know you’re a grown-down because you insist you’re a grown-up.

 

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Populie: It’ll All Work Out… July 16, 2014

 Jonathots Daily Blog

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It’s popular to encourage one another–yet a lie sneaks in when we tell people things will get better without their involvement.

Thus the populie, “It’ll all work out”–it, in this case, normally referring to God, country or destiny.

Religion loves “Happy Heaven travelers.”

Politics adores happy voters.

And the movies certainly favor happy endings.

What’s wrong with that? Is it bad to believe in a positive outcome instead of dwelling on the negative gloom and doom that threatens the horizon?

No. It’s just an issue of how we get there.

If we get there through deception, then we’re not only going to be disappointed, but defeated and ill-suited to take on tomorrow’s adventures.

I do believe in the power of faith and the notion that things can work out. It’s just that I honor a three-step process–because God, my country and certainly a destiny which is failed to be written in the stars can’t guarantee me anything without me showing up prepared.

For things to work out:

1. Nothing happens without a person or people.

I have found that my prayers are much more effective when they’re linked with both supplication and the intelligence of others joining me. I have discovered we have a better country when we include everyone and take others into consideration instead of bullying them because they’ve fallen out of favor. And my destiny is achieved based on how well I handled today, without worrying about tomorrow.

2. We need to get started in order to receive inspired ideas.

Even though we like to believe that every vacation should be paid for up front, each project should be endorsed and funded and our relationships guaranteed for a lifetime, deep in our hearts we know that’s not human.

Inspiration is given to those who are inspired to do something now. The minute we take it to a committee, we’ve already decided not to do it. If you don’t believe me, just look at Washington, D.C.

3. Endurance is knowing when to change and when to continue.

I run across people who think they’re doing a good thing, while they repeat the same mistakes, mistakes dashing their hopes.

And I run across individuals–including myself sometimes–who pull up one block short of completing the trip.

Endurance is what is necessary to save us from calamity, but it is acquired by being inspired with ideas on the move and finding out whether those notions are encouraging us to evolve, or press on with the same path.

• God is not a solo act. He travels, unites and bonds with human beings to perform His will.
• Our country is “we, the people” instead of “we, the whim.”
• And since there is no tomorrow until we create it out of free will, destiny is a modern-day Mother Goose created to comfort folks who have decided to give up.

Watch out for this populie. It’s sneaky.

Sometimes you might feel like the ogre under the bridge, scaring off all the little children by being realistic. Yet we have to speak the truth with love.

Great things demand a person or people, inspiring ideas freshened by effort, and knowing the difference between keeping on and changing course.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Click here to get info on the “Gospel According to Common Sense” Tour

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.

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A Simple Questionnaire … March 10, 2014

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1. What do I want?
2. What do I need?
3. What do I have in ability?
4. What do I fear?
5. What am I doing?
6. What do I desire to do?
7. What is the bridge?

Even though it’s a very simple questionnaire, it is filled with important inquiries, which help us understand more about ourselves and our aspirations.

The confusion of every generation is the ongoing belief that we are not confused. People on their way to the discovery of truth always start out with a bit of personal perplexity, questioning, and maybe even feelings of insecurity, because the road to candor is never clear, but always filled with revelation and sometimes, shocking realities.

So let me be the first to jump in and answer these questions.

First, I want to write, teach and share with my generation without being inhibited by so many restrictions and fears. I would like to escape the rigidity of all the systems that exist, which are determined to bring people into submission to a set of rules instead of helping them find the true cause.

Secondly, I don’t know what I need. I feel pretty comfortable with that because the Good Book tells us that God knows what we need even before we do. Excellent. Maybe that’s why He’s such a good partner–he brings the plastic spoons along for the yogurt, because nobody else thought about actually eating them.

My ability is to use insight with humor, and hopefully a gentle spirit, to communicate difficult ideas and contentious causes in a season where people are so easily offended. I do it through art, music, and hopefully, giggles.

I have a dual fear–falling short of my goals because of my age and physical limitations, and losing my solvency and embarrassing the people around me because my ideas are solid but my bank account is dwindling.

What am I doing? Good question. I’m finishing up a seventeen-year career, working faithfully in the mainline denominational churches, to bring a message of common sense, realizing that I can no longer limit myself to such a tiny market, but must at least attempt to expand my borders.

What I desire is to take that which has been forsaken by society, which has callously cast away great means of communication, replacing them with Instagram, and use these methods to reach people with a simple message of hope and personal responsibility. Just because it’s popular to believe that theater, newspapers, books and even musical albums are obsolete because of downloading, it’s not necessarily true. If I owned Facebook, I would also decry any other form of communication that wasn’t “me.” The world will always return to intimacy. It may take a week; it may take a year. We will come back to needing one another.

Which leads me to the final question. What is the bridge? Just as with my need, I don’t have the foggiest idea. But I’m excited about the search; I’m thrilled about the quest. I feel like a Knight of the Round Table pursuing the Holy Grail.

And I know this: it takes courage to chase something that half the people need and the other half don’t believe in.

But those are the only adventures that are truly worthwhile.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Click for details on the SpirTed 2014 presentation

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.

click to hear music from Spirited 2014