Cracked 5 … May 30th, 2020

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Really Obscure, Nearly Ancient References to June

 

A.  “Huntin’ for Junebugs”

 

B. “Honeymoon…Keep’a shinin’ in June”

 

C. Jewn: a little-used, anti-Semitic slur

 

D. June Cleaver, who was a trifle too flirty with Eddie Haskell

 

E. “June is bustin’ out all over”

 

Populie: Judeo-Christian … May 28, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog

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One of the most popular lies being actively promoted today by politics, religion and entertainment is the validity of the term “Judeo-Christian.”

It works on the basis that Jesus was Jewish. Was Jesus Jewish? If he was, he certainly wasn’t very good at it.

He constantly ignored their traditions, broke the Sabbath rules, cleansed the temple of avarice and then turned around and told them it would be torn down, prophesied of the demise of the Jerusalem hierarchy, frequently flaunted that his message superseded that of previous patriarchs and ended up informing them that their “house was left to them desolate,” as they toted him off–not to a ceremony presenting to their favorite son the key of the city, but rather, to nail him to a cross for being anti-Semitic.

It’s not a strong case for Jesus wanting to continue the traditions of Abraham, Moses and David–especially in deference to the children of Ishmael in the Muslim faith.

A quick look:

• Concerning Abraham–Jesus told them he was around before Abraham and that God could take stones and make children of Abraham.
• Moses–Jesus let them know that the ideas of Moses were “old men thinking” and that he had fresher insight.
• David–he refused to be called the son of David, insisting that David, in the Psalms, referred to him as Lord.

So you can see, he dispelled all notions of being the fulfillment of a wish list from Judaism.

Concerning the Muslims, he mocked the idea of praying five times a day by saying that such an action is filled with vain repetition, and he refuted the idea that men were superior to women by including ladies in his ministry and by forgiving the lass caught in adultery, granting her a second chance from a stone-throwing crowd.

The driving force behind “Judeo-Christian” is the fact that because the Jews were dispersed in 70 A.D. from their home in Palestine, therefore of the approximate fourteen million which remain in our world today, mainly come from a background of Europe and America.

In other words–white.

If Jewish people were actually brown and looked Arab, we would be much less likely to include them in the inner circle of our spiritual brotherhood. But since Judaism does have this European or American flavor to it, we are much more likely, in our bigoted state, to welcome them.

It doesn’t make it right.

And also, politics, religion and entertainment love “Judeo-Christian.” It allows them to pull out obscure passages from the Old Testament to use when they want to pursue violence or greed and they find the Sermon on the Mount to be a bit “pansy.”

Jesus was born of God and woman. This is why we contend it was a virgin birth. If so, it ignores the lineage of David.

Jesus rejected that the Jews were chosen people and that the Muslims were destined to spread Sharia Law across the whole world. He taught that “no one is better than anyone else.”

Listen very closely: without alienating our Jewish brothers and sisters and our Muslim kindred, don’t you think it would be helpful to have a Jesonian approach to Christianity, which separates itself theologically, while still embracing the other religions of the world, emotionally?

As long as we promote “Judeo-Christian,” Muslim extremists will strap bombs to their bodies to blow the hell out of our idea. I am not guaranteeing you that the children of Ishmael and the children of Isaac will ever get along.

But it won’t help if the children of Jesus … pick a side.

 

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After an appearance earlier this year in Surprise, Arizona, Janet and I were blessed to receive a “surprise” ourselves. Click on the beautiful Arizona picture above to share it with us!

Click here to get info on the “Gospel According to Common Sense” Tour

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.

Click here to listen to Spirited music

 

 

Alabama Allegations… September 26, 2012

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Alabama is not my “sweet home,” but I have always enjoyed my numerous visits to the state.

It is located on about the third notch of the Bible Belt (even though with me being blubbery, I prefer an elastic waist). As is often the case in many of the communities in our southern regions, people in Alabama go to church a lot, respecting God and country with tremendous personal fervor. So when I arrived with my proclamation that “NoOne is better than anyone else,” I found myself greeted with a small smile, only partially disguising a wince. My Alabamian brothers and sisters immediately offered two allegations to potentially contradict my theorem:

Allegation One: “Jonathan, isn’t the Jewish nation the chosen people? Doesn’t that make them better?”

I would like to introduce each and every one of you–and also re-acquaint myself–with the power of reading the Bible to discover a consensus. Facts are, it is easy to find a single verse in the Bible to back up almost any notion, perversion, lifestyle or inclination. But when you pursue further, you will discover that many other verses not only temper that particular assertion, but sometimes update or flat-out contradict it.

Since we are Christians and not followers of Moses, we have to go to the words of Jesus to find what he thought about this concept of the Children of Israel being “chosen.” Matter of fact, I will guarantee you on this fine morning that the main reason he hung between earth and sky, suspended by nails, was that they did not favor his opinion on their manifest destiny. He told the Jews bluntly that they took “great pride in being the children of Abraham” but that God had every capability of taking a common rock laying beside the road and turning it into a “child of Abraham.” You can imagine, considering the nationalistic pride frothing at the time, that this particular teaching was met with quite a bit of resistance.

We are also clearly informed that God is “no respecter of persons,” so even though there are those who would love to propagate the notion that Israel and the Jews are a chosen people, favored by God, and therefore they are unique by birthright, the general consensus of the Bible, which we call the Word, is that God has opened His door to include everyone equally.

So as not to get a bunch of emails from people suggesting that I am anti-Semitic, I will tell you that I believe that Israel has every right to exist, be respected and honored for her traditions. It’s just that since  the time that Jesus walked the earth, Jewish people are not preferred above Arabs or anyone else.

Allegation Two: “Jonathan, you certainly believe that Billy Graham is better than Charles Manson, right?”

You see, this is the idea that we are unique by salvation. I can always tell when people are desperate to win an argument. They either bring up their pet dog, Hitler or Charles Manson. They mention their pet dog because they want to create sympathy; Hitler, to prove how bad people are, and Charles Manson when they want to convince you that some people are beyond hope.

So let me tell you what I told these fine folks from Alabama. Actually, thief that I am, I borrowed the sentiment from Jesus. Talking one day to a group of gossiping Galileans, he asked them if they thought that the people who had recently been killed by Pilate were worse sinners than those who didn’t die. And after all, we do the same thing. If someone survives a hurricane, we insist that “God was with them,” which, whether we like it or not, connotes that the people who perished were at least secretly somewhat dastardly.

Jesus’ response to his own question about this “worse sinner” possibility was, “Except you repent, you will all likewise perish.”

You see, folks, it’s basically a PR situation–life comes along and the first thing you need to do is participate. It is true that there are greater benefits if you indulge in earthly activities by following the rules, but when you don’t, you get a second crack, which is called repentance. If you repent, you are blessed with a clean slate to participate again with a little bit more wisdom.

It doesn’t matter whether you are Billy Graham or Charles Manson–the same rules apply. Participate and repent. If you don’t choose to participate, don’t expect anything to happen. If you do participate, make a mistake and stubbornly refuse to repent, don’t expect to be able to participate anymore. It’s really that simple.

Many people were shocked when Charles Manson was the murderous propagator of so many slain, innocent people. I, too, was appalled, but I awaited the great miracle of repentance. It never came. So righteously, Charlie-boy doesn’t get to participate anymore.

But honestly, folks, if we found out something bad about Billy Graham tomorrow, most Christians would abandon him. I, instead, would wait for the repentance. And once my dear brother repented, I would welcome him back into the family of man, to participate.

Do I believe that Billy Graham is better than Charles Manson? Not by creation. He gains footing on earth’s soil because he repents–and if he didn’t repent, like Mr. Manson, he would find himself perishing one miserable day at a time, in a tiny jail cell.

So participate, and if you don’t, please understand that nothing will happen. After you participate, take note of the quality of your efforts and repent where stupidity has clearly been pointed out to you. It gives you license to participate again. There is no such thing as “worse sinners.” Just terrible repenters.

So this ended my little excursion into Alabama, where people tried to establish that we are unique by birthright, or, as in the case of Billy Graham, unique by salvation. But after I had a friendly conversation with these lovely folks, I made it clear to them that God is no respecter of persons, and that the key to human life is participating and repenting.

I moved on down the road and landed in Missouri, which they refer to as the “Show Me” State. I was certainly not going to escape their scrutiny with my new-fangled phrase.

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