Sit Down Comedy … August 7th, 2020

Jonathots Daily Blog

(4487)

“Let me think about it.”

In my youthful fervor, I was swelled with expectation when I heard him say this. Or was it her? Sometimes it was “they.”

Just realizing that after a long conversation in which I presented my case, that this human being was going to go off and think about it, kept the door open for a positive conclusion to what in the present moment seemed to be a looming negative.

“Thinking about it.”

Then the years passed.

I learned.

I discovered that no one thinks about anything.

How could we be thinking and still argue racism, gender bias, abortion, murder and supremacy of any type or any fashion?

How could we believe that human beings are musing over information—considering the results of “great debate” to draw conclusions—when we sit here on the verge of a Presidential election with basically the same statistics for the favored donkey or pet elephant that we had four years ago?

Are you trying to tell me that in four years nothing has changed to alter the consciousness of the American people whatsoever?

Or is it that we never really think about it?

Alas, alas…

The brain is a train that will not refrain until we all go insane.

You see, it’s been programmed.

By the time we are five years old, seventy percent of our mores, preferences, attitudes and fairness are already planted deep into our virgin brains by those who had been implanted themselves and don’t know what else to offer.

Intelligence is not our doorway to “peace on Earth, good will toward men.”

Education will leave us short of the need.

We are not capable of such a maneuver. This is why we purchase domesticated animals. They remind us what devotion looks like and tenderness feels like.

The brain cannot be renewed unless we learn to deal with our emotions—come clean with our feelings and allow for the possibility that the human soul could be the restoration area to feed the cranium with fresh insight.

The philosopher said, “I think, therefore I am.”

I’m sorry.

I think, therefore I am too predictable.

What makes us ablaze with potential, on fire with creativity and ignitors of legitimate love is allowing our feelings to be real, our soul to refine those sensations, renewing the brain to do something other than grump out the usual response.

 

3 Things … December 27th, 2018

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Jonathots Daily Blog

(3907)

That Will Make You a Better Parent

1. Have your own vigorous, exciting life, separate from your children.

2. Invite your children to be part of that vigorous life and include them in activities that enhance it.

3. Don’t let them control the household or your life by their attitudes.

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“Ifing” Way: Part 1… October 20, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2387)

What if a voice of sanity had risen up at various stages in the story of human history, to offer a challenging view when craziness was about to win the day?

If …

It was the third night in a row she had returned home from work brooding. It wasn’t that she was always a sparkling conversationalist, but now a sadness had etched its way onto her features, making her apppear continually unhappy, which left him a little disgruntled, feeling that he was somehow at fault.

Tired of being uncertain of her feelings and attitudes, he broached the issue.

“What’s wrong — and before you tell me nothing, let me tell you that I know there is something, so let’s work with it from that angle.”

She looked surprised.

He laughed. “So now you’re gonna act surprised,” he said. “I know you’re not surprised. You probably just don’t want to talk about it.”

She took a long pause–so lengthy that he almost inserted another opinion, but restrained himself to allow her space.

“I have something to tell you,” she began, tears forming in her eyes.

He squelched an internal flinch, wondering how this could end up with anything good.

She continued. “You know that tree we were supposed to avoid?”

He thought for a second, then remembered and nodded.

She went on with her tale. “Well, I was a little confused about it. Maybe even a little frustrated. So I spent some time down there, just checking it out. I immediately discovered it wasn’t that different from any other tree on our land. Matter of fact, it was rather pleasant looking. Appealing.”

He resisted the instinct to interrupt and just nodded again.

“Well, long story short, I got tempted, maybe even urged, to eat the fruit. And ever since then, I’ve felt guilty and naked.”

“What do you mean by naked?” he inquired.

She squinted. “You know. Without being covered.”

“Covered with what?” he asked, frowning.

“I don’t know. This is why I didn’t want to tell you. I knew you wouldn’t understand. You are so much a man…”

“Now I am confused,” he inserted. “We’ve never talked like this before. It was never ‘man’ and ‘woman.’ Just us. What’s going on?”

“I ate the goddamned fruit,” she screamed. “There! You’ve got it.”

Adam took a deep breath. He knew the next thing he would say was crucial. “So that’s why you feel bad?”

“No!” she said emphatically. “I feel good! Alive! Alert. Just confused. Maybe if you ate the fruit with me and shared in the experience we could work it out together. Aren’t you self-conscious about being naked?”

“Actually,” he replied, “I’m baffled about the concept. I just thought this is the way we came.”

She sighed, frowned, hissed and grumbled all at the same time. At length she spoke.

“So are you gonna eat the fruit with me or not?”

He took her by the shoulders, pulled her close and kissed her on the forehead.

“No. What we’re going to do is take you to our Creator and explain what happened.”

She pulled back in horror. “No damn way! He’s gonna kill me. Isn’t that what He said? If you eat the fruit you’ll die?”

“Yes,” said Adam. “But I didn’t know what it meant, so I just kind of ignored it.”

“I don’t want to die,” said Eve.

“I don’t want to lose you,” said Adam. “But … I don’t want to lose Him either. Don’t make me choose.”

She burst into tears. He embraced her and held her close.

“Listen,” he said. “If He loved us enough to make us, He sure can love us enough to forgive us.”

“Us?” she questioned.

“Yes. We’re in this together. And together, let’s go talk to Him.”

 

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The Sermon on the Mount in music and story. Click the mountain!

 

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G-15: Compete or Compare?… March 14, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog  

(2176)

Yours worked.

Mine didn’t.

Now what?

Give me yours.

You take mine.

Why not??

Okay, yours is over-rated.

Mine is misunderstood.

What do you mean, sour grapes?

You cheated.

I followed the rules.

I don’t know how, but you must have cheated.

Try this: you had an advantage.

I don’t know–maybe you’re an outstanding cheater.

I went against the grain.

You went for blood.

Everybody likes you.

I am an artist and therefore adequately ignored.

You had more money.

I had a low budget.

Really? That little??

What do you want me to do?

Imitate your plan?

I was trained to compete.

You want me to compare.

It’s not fair.

What do you mean, the famous last words of a drowning loser?

Okay, smarty. What do you suggest?

Do well? And be accepted?

What about my personal flair, unique perspective, opinions, attitudes, sense of self?

(pause)

 You don’t care, do you?

All right. So how do you pull this thing off?

Go ahead and teach me. I’m listening, but you better hurry. I can be a moody son of a gun.

(Longer pause)

Huh, sounds easier than my ideas.

I guess I can do that.

Of course, I’ll need to add my personality.

(Short pause)

Not so much?

All right. Here I am.

By the way…

Thanks.

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Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.

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Trion for Size … December 4, 2013

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2084)

It was Monday morning.

We hauled our instruments into our motel room, set up and prepared for a rehearsal which also was an inspirational session of putting together our Spirited Christmas Show. We would have just a couple of hours, and then the next day we would be performing in Trion, Georgia.

I always find it great fun. Matter of fact, it really boils down to a simple little formula, which is almost fool-proof because it takes into account the nature of human beings.

Sorting through the material, I look for four ingredients:

1. Something fast.
2. Slow it down.
3. Bring some heart.
4. Make ’em laugh

Any time you put together that quadrangle of attitudes and gratitudes, you’re bound to have success.

But it got me thinking. How is life in general any different?

After all, we do need something fast.

We need to be quick on the uptake, to step in and be courteous, assisting one another when it’s in our power to do so.

Isn’t it important to slow it down?

How valuable can you become when you walk into a room that’s harried, worried and frustrated and you get everybody to calm themselves and quietly consider options?

I don’t know what we’d do without bringing the heart.

The religious package we offer to mankind in our churches is often heavy-laden with spiritual theology or tipsy with mental acuity and ideas. But here’s the problem: we’re emotional people, and if you don’t touch the heart, you can’t bless your fellow-travelers. What’s the best way to bring the heart? Admit your weakness and then testify about what makes you stronger.

And finally, make ’em laugh.

Do we really think anything special in life will happen without good cheer? Have a solemn and somber generation of old-thinking human beings ever generated a revival or a renaissance? If you remove the Mayflower and the idea of having turkey at Thanksgiving, the Pilgrims are a pretty empty group. Make ’em laugh.

So Jan and I sat down and came up with a show that had something fast. Then we slowed it down to bring the heart and make ’em laugh.

Last night we took it to Trion, Georgia, and it was sized perfectly.

We can learn from what works if we’re not afraid to work with what we’ve learned.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Click for details on the SpirTed 2014 presentation

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.

click to hear music from Spirited 2014

How to Make a Mistake: Three Easy Steps… October 3, 2013

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2025)

If revenge is a dish best served cold, then mistakes are brats, piping hot off the grill, with a side of pickle.

I would love to believe that my mistakes are innocent fumbles caused by either a lack of information or a willingness to do what’s right which went astray.

But it isn’t true.

All mistakes are stirred up from a recipe of attitudes which should have been addressed long ago, but we have convinced ourselves if they were removed, our   arms and legs might fall off.

Here are the three easy steps that lead to all mistakes:

1. Be sure you are right. It is almost impossible to convince someone of a better way if they think all of their thoughts are heavenly. I know we extol the value of confidence, but often it is just arrogance, trying to get in the door wearing sunglasses.

2. Ignore history. Ninety percent of the mistakes we make are revisits. Somewhere along the line, we convince ourselves that THIS situation is unique, and not like the last failure whatsoever. Not only do we fail to take into consideration the ridiculous practices of our ancestors, we also do not include our own experience in creating our new possibility.

3. Refuse to change. Yes, there are human beings who believe they are better than others because they will not alter the course of their determination. I have to ask myself if there is ANYTHING I believe today that is exactly the same as twenty years ago. If you and I were truthful, the answer would most certainly be no. It is not so much that the world is changing as it is that we don’t completely understand our world. So the stubbornness that causes us to refuse to change spits in the eye of God and punches Mother Nature in the nose. You might expect some throwback.

So that’s how you make a mistake in three easy steps. But to swing this to a more positive conclusion, let us say that we can avoid many foibles by realizing that we could be wrong, counting the cost, factoring in our experience before making a decision, being ready to change our attitude, expand our knowledge, and increase our prospects.

There aren’t as many accidents in heaven and earth as the average mortal would like to portray.

We are blessed because we are given the bowls, spoons and ingredients to whip up a great dish for ourselves.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about personal appearances or scheduling an event

Antidote … September 22, 2013

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2014)

I am a poison.

It is a rather recent discovery; may I say, somewhat disheartening?

I always viewed myself as a perpetually refreshing drink, cooling and soothing–a blessing, if you will.

I’ve worked very hard … (Oh, forgive me for that. How pretentious.) Truthfully, I’ve simply focused on a couple of principles of congeniality in an attempt to turn myself into a pleasant beverage.

So imagine my surprise the other night, when I discovered that a relationship I’ve nurtured for twenty-one years was actually needful of termination in order for the person I was trying to assist and enlighten to escape my poison.

Yes, to him, I was deadly.

It isn’t true of most folks. Most individuals I encounter take in my elixir and find it intoxicating and sweet. But I must be fully aware that the choices I’ve made, the person I’ve become and the attitudes I hold dear are poisonous to travelers whose bumps in the road have varied greatly from mine.

I wondered if there was a way for me to change my configuration just enough to cease to be venom to this journeyman–and then I came to the conclusion that some things are just not meant to be. The reason we need everybody in the whole world is because the world is big and varied in its tastes, and one dose of medicine does not necessarily heal all ailments.

Still, I felt a deep sense of loss and hurt. Was it vanity? Was it some sort of childish tantrum: “How dare this human being find ME repugnant?”

Did I really care about him? Or only have feelings about him as it related to me?

Good questions. I’m really not sure.

But you see, it doesn’t really make any difference. In this case, I am a dose of humanity which should be bypassed because my chemistry is lethal.

There is a maturity that settles into our souls when we realize that we are not someone’s cup of tea, but instead, their mug of hemlock.

Is it possible to have universal value? Yes. But that treasure always has to contain the word “love,” and the presence of love always means to seek better for others.

I am not “better” for my friend. My way of thinking, doing, walking and living is a source of aggravation.

This is why we need a savior–because quite honestly, none of us are able to save ourselves and the human representations around us are often murderous.

I learned something. I came to the blessed conclusion that we make ourselves available to others, allow them to sip and not insist that they gulp, granting them  the opportunity to determine whether our particular concoction is nutritious to their being.

We grow up as people when we realize that if they need us it is good … and if they don’t, it is even better.

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about personal appearances or scheduling an event