Cracked 5… November 17th, 2015

 Jonathots Daily Blog

(2755)

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Reasons the Internet Gang Are Convinced That Obama Caused the Paris Terrorist Attacks

 

A. Turns out that one of the killers was a fake Syrian refugee. Obama wants to bring 10,000 more here to kill off good Christian Republicans before the election in 2016.

 

B. Obama once uttered “Paris” and “attack” in the same speech, thus signaling the event.

 

C. Every Parisian with a beret did not have a grenade launcher to fight back. Obama gun control. After all, croissants don’t stop bullets.

 

D. Obama is in charge of all things foreign. For years he has wanted to change “Uncle Sam” to Uncle Siam.”

 

E. He, too, is brownish.

 

Uncle Sam

 

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PoHymn: A Rustling in the Stagnant … February 18, 2015

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2507)

Pohymn February 18

Two by Two

Angry news

Conflicting views

Pundits tell

Not well

Need hope

Can’t cope

Blank verse

Brings curse

Some turn

We learn

Traitors scurry

Faithful worry

Two conceive

Others believe

Children cry

Innocent die

Repetitious prayer

Produces scare

Insipid singing

Joyless bringing

Bullets speed

Flesh bleed

War increase

Seek peace

Prophets share

Limited care

Simple flow

Will grow

When I

Ask why

And you

Do too

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