Jonathots Daily Blog
(4091)
What it takes to be a:
Politician—Finding yourself unexplainably interesting
Mother—Still not crying over spilled milk
Father—Hanging around to plan birthday parties
Football player—Surviving the hits
Farmer—First, plant yourself
Chauvinist—Act like a pig
Christian—Hate religion but love Jesus
Soldier—Take orders
Banker—Be-A-Count-Able
Butcher—A real cut-up
Blogger—Keeping your parents’ basement reasonably clean
Housewife—A house, a husband…a kitchen
Model—Cat-walking (no fur)
Singer—Croon in tune
Dancer—Stepping up to the routine
Professor—Be noteworthy
Poet—Making rhyme with your reason
Carpenter—Nailing it down and not screwing it up
Pilot—Staying high at all times
Salesman—Selling out
Uber Driver—Unoffended when angry people tell you where to go
Author—Finding the words, editing the turds
Doctor—Smooth operator
Lawyer—Making a federal case out of everything
Matador—Swooshing through the bullshit with your glorious cape
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