Twain … February 28, 2013

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And the two shall be one flesh …

Words describing relationship and marriage.

Actually, that’s the easy part–skin to skin, tissue to tissue, body to body. That comes naturally–so naturally to our species that we can perform it multiple times with different partners without too much difficulty.

What we have trouble with is the process of becoming one in the other three parts of our being–heart, soul and mind. It is further complicated by a culture which greatly emphasizes sexuality as a primary ingredient in marriage while setting a temperature and climate for interaction between the sexes to be frigid.

It’s a mixed signal. We are told that marriage is so sacred that it dare not be redefined. Yet we are constantly changing the definition of the roles of men and women and the playground rules by which they interact. It is rather difficult to believe that a man and woman riding across the United States in a Conestoga wagon in 1872 were actually having lengthy discussions about how different they were. In that particular environment, difference was their enemy and finding commonality was their only salvation.

The last remnants of chauvinism in our society exist in the manipulation of facts concerning the discourse, conversation and lifestyles between men and women. For after all, there are two ways to keep women in subjection and men in dominance: you can dress the women in dark clothes and make them cover their faces or you can pretend that they are just so beyond comprehension that it’s really not worth the time to fuss about it.

When Adam decided he wanted Eve, God relented. God called them BOTH Adam and established them in equality. It was at that point that they decided to create emotional, spiritual and mental chasms between each other while still enjoying one another’s flesh.

It just doesn’t work.

If the primary relationship in your life is an attempt to disguise your true feelings so as to maintain peace and quiet, then the most important thing you’re doing is a failure. Is it possible that society could be completely wrong on an issue and that we’re merely waiting for someone to come along and expose it for its inadequacy?

Of course.

Historically, society has been perniciously erred. Why? Because if you get enough people to say something loud enough and often enough, it starts sounding like the truth. It isn’t. It’s just overwhelming.

So what makes up a good relationship? What would truly make marriage sacred instead of a moody throw-away? How do we find what was originally intended in the Garden of Eden? How can we climb up into that Conestoga wagon and gain insight into the community that was created between a husband and wife on such a precarious mission, and still maintain our I-phones and I-pads?

There is a way to be twain (two) and still be one person with one mind.

Let’s talk about it tomorrow.

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