Cracked 5 … November 10th, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3852)

Cracked 5

Takeaways from the Midterm Election

A. You can spend lots of money and still end up pretty much right where you started

 

B. We want people to vote–unless we don’t like the way they vote

 

C. Vote shaming has replaced fat shaming

 

D. Another Florida recount should be exciting and fulfilling

 

E. Politics makes strange fellows–forget about the bed

Republicans and Democrats


Donate ButtonThe producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this inspirational opportunity

 


Buy Mr. Kringle's Tales

Click the elephant to see what he’s reading!

 

Cracked 5 … November 3rd, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3845)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

The Main Reasons for the Existence of the Month of November

A. Purging turkeys

 

B. Including dressing and cranberry sauce into family squabbles

 

C. Overwrought arguments about Christmas

 

D. Evidence that all leaves will not be raked

 

E.  Rhymes with “September” in the 30-day song

 

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this inspirational opportunity

 


Buy Mr. Kringle's Tales

Click the elephant to see what he’s reading!

 

Cracked 5 … October 13th, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3824)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

More Appropriate Names for Hurricanes (All in the “B” Family)

 

A. Breaking wind

 

B. Blow me

 

C. Beach Bango

 

D. Ball-buster

 

E. Bitchy

 

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this inspirational opportunity

 


Buy Mr. Kringle's Tales

Click the elephant to see what he’s reading!

 

Cracked 5 … October 6th, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3817)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

Worst Halloween Costumes of All Time

A. A peach, wearing just your fuzz

 

B. Benedict Arnold

 

C. A school shooter

 

D. An elephant with a nose job

 

E. A zit, popping Hellman’s Mayonnaise

Bad Halloween costumes

 


Buy Mr. Kringle's Tales

Click the elephant to see what he’s reading!

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this inspirational opportunity

 

Cracked 5 … September 15th, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3796)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

Signs that the Summer is Over

A. Your fifth batch of pool toys is officially deflated

 

B. Flip-flops are marked down

 

C. It’s colder

 

D. High school cheerleaders go back on the pill

 

E. Christmas decorations

end of summer

 

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

 

Cracked 5 … August 21st, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3771)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

Reasons Given for Not Attending Church

 

A. Too much gluten in the communion wafer

 

B. Don’t like heaven, nor favor hell

 

C. PEW-trification

 

D. Allergic to sermons

 

E. The choir is white–REALLY white.

 

 

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

 

Cracked 5 … August 14th, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

(3765)

cracked 5 logo keeper with border

Since the mustache continues to persist (like the flu) here are some types to be looking out for:


The Bushy Broom

(Sweepin’ those gals off their feet)


The Magic Marker

(Probably put on with a magic marker)


The Caterpillar

(Creepy, with no possibility of turning into a butterfly)


The Dictator

(Will all hairs please report to the middle of the lip?)


The Sparse Farce

(Time to face it. You can’t grow a mustache)

 

Donate Button

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

 

%d bloggers like this: