Cracked 5 … May 22nd, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

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Names for Farts That Sound Like English Royal Families

 

A. The Earl of Stench

 

B. Richard the Lion-Farted

 

C. The Stuart of Squirt

 

D. Mary Queen of Pots

 

E. The House of Tooter

 

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Cracked 5 … January 23rd, 2018


Jonathots Daily Blog

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Special Sporting Events Which Once Again Have Been Rejected for the 2018 Winter Olympics

A.  International Snowball Hats

 

B.  Nordic Poleless Skiing

 

C.  Ladies Figure Slush Skating

 

D.  Three-Man Bob Slobbering

 

E.  Frisball (deflated basketballs are tossed through the air to the goal to score points)

 

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PoHymn: A Rustling in the Stagnant … October 21st, 2015

 Jonathots Daily Blog

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PoHymn October 21st

Even When

I want to be a light

But often in the dark

I yearn to win the fight

But find I’m stuck in park

I dream of changing the tide

Of shining a better way

But joining the wrong side

Absent the words to say

At times I am a witness

Evidence of good thought

Then lazy, devoid of fitness

To complete what I sought

My failure makes me cry

Weakness tempts me to lie

Faith encourages the need to try

And pride wants me to die

I refuse to understand my appeal

Possessed by selfish zeal

To some I am a solution

To others, living pollution

But to each I bring my story

Filled with pain and glory

Yes, even when I am weak

My heart has a message to speak.

 

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Getting in Character … August 3rd, 2015

 

Jonathots Daily Blog

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From Act II, Scene VII of As You Like It, Shakespeare asserts that “all the world is a stage and all the men and women, merely players.”

The society of humanity offers pernicious quantities of advice while releasing miniscule portions of support.

There’s a very simple reason for this. Each one of us mortals is deeply afraid that we will fail to receive our required recognition.

So because this climate exists, caution is pushed to the forefront to protect our turf, which lends itself to a backlash, often resulting in evil.

Therefore, we are offered a banquet table with the only entrees being “dull” and “dark.” For a while “dull” is offered as normal, which is followed by a rebellion, which tries to focus on the more unseemly parts of our character. And then, when we get nervous about the world becoming too dark, we “dull out” again, to an uncomfortable level of blandness.

It happens in politics, religion and entertainment.

No one seems to be able to break the cycle. We seem to accept the fact that life in itself is pretty boring, unless you spice it up with vice, sin and bleakness, which lends itself to selfishness and evil.

Yet the people who are recalled by historians as earth-shakers always provide something bold and bright.

Without these individuals, our history would have ceased many times over and cast us into a permanent Dark Ages.

How can you offer something bold to overcome the dull?

Always remember that human beings have two basic needs: they require purpose and praisepurpose in the sense of understanding why they are doing what they are doing, and praise exemplified through enjoyment and appreciation.

So first of all, you can affect any scene in your life by bringing purpose and praise to it instead of feeding the bland and the boring.

Secondly, we need something to enlighten us. Actually, there’s nothing wrong with exposing the darker portions of the human character as long as you do it with light instead of exaggerating the depths of bleakness.

Things get dark enough without us turning off the lights. People of character always must bring some light to the darkness; otherwise, we’ll end up negative and cursing one another.

  • If the world becomes too dull, we become infatuated with the dark.
  • Once frightened of the dark, we too quickly will return to the dull.

Your job, while getting in character, is to bring the bold and the bright and become a light to the world.

 

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