Cracked 5 … July 4th, 2020

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Ways to Have an Acceptable Covid-19 July 4^th Celebration

1. Set fire to all your clothing that has been exposed to the virus and stand around the bonfire singing, “This Is My Country.”

 

2. Sparklers in the back yard—six feet apart.

 

3. Eat. Yes, eating is still legal.

 

4. Avoid watching “Independence Day,” since it’s an attack by an alien presence.

 

5. Walk to the corner and back, and upon returning cleanse yourself with a garden hose. Perhaps you could make it a family “hose-down.”

 

3 Things … July 11th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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That Make a Great Meal

1. Prepare it with someone you love

 

2. Make it simple so that it’s always fun

 

3. Eat it with gratitude and laughter

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation for this inspirational opportunity

 

1 Thing You Can Do This Week To Be More Balanced

Watch Your Mouth

You see, your mouth is the problem.

Because what goes in your mouth makes you fat, and what comes out often makes you sound like a fat-head.

So here’s the key:

Purposely Talk Less

And while you’re at it, eat a little less, too.

Counteract those two by laughing more and forcing yourself to speak kindness.

Because what have you got to lose but a few pounds and the ugly nickname, “Grouchy Stiltskin?”

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly donation for this inspirational opportunity

 

G-17: Dust, Breath, Soul… March 28, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog  

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Take a moment.

Step out of the jungle.

Walk away until all the noise disappears.

What do you feel?

Free. Separate. Valuable.

For you see, there must be more than survival.

There needs to be a special purpose and energy for welcoming the new day.

I will tell you of a certainty, eating and drinking are thought-clogging.

Dominance produces a winner with no real victory.

Yes, we need to have a creature possessing a brotherhood with the jungle, but a sonship with the spiritual.

Dust. I am of Earth. It is where I came from and where I return.

Breath. I am alive. I require sustenance but I share with the earth my best, also.

Soul. I am of God. Not personally divine. A pinch of salt for the earth, a single ray of light for the world.

I am compelled to escape mere survival in reverence to holy pursuits.

Dust of the earth. Breath of life. Living soul.

Blessed, but no longer suitable for the jungle, and much too unpredictable for the heavens.

Suspended…

A miracle in contradictions.

 

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

Click here to get info on the “Gospel According to Common Sense” Tour

Please contact Jonathan’s agent, Jackie Barnett, at (615) 481-1474, for information about scheduling SpiriTed in 2014.