Sit Down Comedy … September 27th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Sit Down Comedy

Today I would like to use my pulpit of potential—my moment in minutia—to give tribute to the most truthful man in Washington, D.C.:

President Donald J. Trump

For certainly, there’s no way to call a man a liar who has already bragged about how much he enjoys lying.

You will never convict him of his mistruths when he let you know from the very beginning that he missed out on truth some time ago and selected a different path. Matter of fact, in his 1985 book, “Art of the Deal,” he contended (and I quote), “I play to people’s fantasies. People may not always think big themselves, but they can still get very excited by those who do. That’s why a little hyperbole never hurts.”

He has made clear what he means by “hyperbole.”

And if you aren’t sure, his consort, Kelly Ann Conway, named the practice “Alternative Facts.” Alternative Facts is merely offering a different rendition of the information provided—one that better suits your own purposes. After people hear the Alternative Facts, they begin to blend them with other reports, which eventually becomes what we call a “news story.” Then folks like us come along and pick out our favorite rendition from the buffet of possibilities.

In 2016, Donald Trump’s competitor was Hillary Clinton, who on the other hand, proclaimed herself squeaky clean.

When it was discovered she wasn’t quite as cleansed as reported, she chose to follow the philosophy of her husband, Bill, who insisted that when accusations are made against you, “always deny.”

So the God-fearing, hardworking American people were given a choice between an accomplished liar and a proficient denier.

So the situation is, for every three hundred alternative facts that President Trump may offer, there can always be found ten missteps, mistakes and misrepresentations from an opponent. The only difference is, the pronounced liar doesn’t have to repent because he’s already warned. But the one who has done the missteps—who has proclaimed him or herself pure and truthful—must decide whether to come clean or pick up a copy of “Art of the Deal” and apply his or her application of “hyperbole.”

Actually, we should be ashamed of ourselves for impeaching a man who is so obvious with us that he came down the escalator calling Mexicans rapists, explaining how simple it was to grab unwilling pussy and was fully capable of multiplying the attendance numbers at any event.

After all, Secretary Clinton continued to stand by her man—who denied his sins against the nation—placing the blame on Monica Lewinsky, a twenty-one-year-old impressionable internist crawling under his desk, trying to do her part for the country.

Who should be impeached is simple: the American voter.

Since the founding of the country, we have well known that the common person has no right, privilege or sense to select the uncommon leader of the Free World.

No intelligent corporation allows the rank and file to choose the CEO.

President of the United States is a job, not a position.

It requires a willingness to learn, savvy, personality, gentleness, intensity and above all, a passion to hear the ideas of other people and sift through them until logic emerges.

But since we are determined to extol the beauty of the vote—and then worse, place the final responsibility on the Electoral College (which is similar to a Milton Bradley board game) we are stuck with winners who are alluring instead of enduring.

I want each and every liberal to stop calling Donald Trump a liar and instead, refer to him as a “fulfiller.” He has fulfilled exactly what he set out to do, which is make himself the sole spokesman for our country.

And I want the right wing to be candid—the interest they have in Donald Trump is similar to how each and every one of us wanted to goof around with the “really bad kid” in high school, even though our parents warned us against him. But even though we appreciated goodness (kind of) but were convinced that Bad Boy was more fun.

To summarize:

God has not called Donald Trump to lead our nation.

God has not called any of the other twenty-two candidates from the Democratic Party to lead our nation.

God is not calling anyone.

God has provided science, a beautiful planet, and great human beings around us, hoping that we can use these elements to start making positive choices and value the currency of our words.

So please, stop believing that those who say they always tell the truth actually do.

And cease getting angry with a man who is comfortable in his own skin—being deceptive.

So I will close this by saying, we must cease attempting to impeach a man who thinks he is doing what he considers the best thing possible.

If you don’t want someone who shares Alternative Facts, vote him out next election.

If you’re worried that he’s going to win the country over again with his Alternative Facts, then you need to work on the conscience of your brothers and sisters instead of trying to make all the little pigs frightened of the Big Bad Wolf.

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Three Ways to Blaze a Trail … October 16, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Davy Crockett

1. Find a forest that needs a path.

There are many bramble bushes of confusion in society today. It often seems that the only way they’re being addressed is by pundits who further confuse the issues. So you can become a force of nature simply by problem solving instead of problem debating.

The three largest difficulties facing us at this point are gender inequality, racial prejudice and pernicious apathy. There is plenty of room for trail-blazers.

Find a forest. Build a path.

2. Don’t be afraid of the bears and the wolves.

There are bears in our society who want to scare you away with their growl and claws, and wolves who would like to take a bite of you in order to establish their dominance. But just like the bears and wolves in the actual woods, they are more afraid of you than you are of them.

Walk confidently, let them see you coming, and stay faithful without apprehension.

3. Cut down some trees so people can see the forest.

You remember the old saying: “can’t see the forest for the trees.”

Sometimes nature gets in the way of our progress. There are institutions, organizations and even religious conclaves which must be trimmed down to make room for human beings to enjoy the forest.

We can no longer merely throw our hands up in the air and sigh, “What am I going to do?” and think that we’re going to have the life we presently enjoy, or anything resembling it, to pass onto our children.

You will need to blaze a trail, but like all the pioneers and explorers before you, you will have to escape your seat of comfort and learn how to take dominion in unknown territory. 

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Peace with the Pieces… March 10, 2013

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piecesIt was odd.

I was suddenly overwhelmed by the notion of my own inadequacy.

Thinking about the sharing I would be doing tomorrow morning at Cornerstone United Methodist Church in Houston, Texas, I was confronted with my lacking. I am a bald, aging man with limited mobility, who has suffered–or at least struggled–with obesity all my life.

To say that I feel humbled by the notion of offering exhortation, edification or even insight into the lives of others would be an oversimplification of my vacancy. I don’t know whether anybody is worthy to be a voice crying in the wilderness–especially entrusted with the concept of challenging people to “prepare the way of the Lord and make His paths straight.”

Somehow or another it seems prudent for me to straighten some of my own paths before instructing others in path-straightening.

But what does that mean? Am I to sit around and wait until I am a worthy representation of goodness in order to praise goodness, point to goodness or even stand in awe of what goodness can do?

I am pieces, trying to make peace with myself.

I am chunks of what could be a whole, but doesn’t really promise to ever coagulate.

I am an incomplete vessel who really has only one responsibility–don’t lie about my insufficiency. Don’t exaggerate my qualification. And don’t pretend to be anything other than the subtotal of my pieces.

When my knees gave out on me late last year, I thought my time  of speaking in front of audiences and pouring out my heart was over. I honestly did not want to be a disgrace to the kingdom of God through my weakness. I was determined to develop an excuse for escaping my continued participation in the unification of the human spirit with the presence of God by pulling up lame–literally.

Maybe it’s just that I felt stupid. Maybe “wheeling” my way in front of an audience to hobble to my keyboard was just a little too much hyperbole of uselessness.

I don’t know. It wasn’t that I wanted to quit. It just seemed that quitting was an honorable thing. Make room for someone who’s more … whole.

And then I remembered the words that God said to Adam in the Garden when his little buddy was hiding among the fig leaves.

“Why are you hiding?”

“I’m hiding because I’m naked,” said Adam.

“Who told you that you were naked?” asked God.

Yes–who told me I was unworthy? Who told me I was weak and beyond redemption? Who told me that it was time to graze in the grass instead of  shepherding people to greener pastures?

I did.

I decided what was righteous.

I decided what was beautiful.

I decided what was marketable.

God hasn’t worked with me for these many years and seen me crash and bounce to the earth to not allow me to continue to speak my mind.

I’m finding ways to be at peace with my pieces. For after all, being complete is over-rated. When we express our weakness, those around us perceive us as stronger by the confession. When we pronounce our strengths, yet obviously sprout flaws, we are only made weaker by our boasting.

I come to you in pieces, trying to find a way to have peace with them.

You can decide … whether it’s worth hearing.

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