Ask Jonathots… September 15th, 2016

 Jonathots Daily Blog

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I truly don’t understand what the big deal is about sex. I haven’t figured out why people think your sex related decisions define you. Is it just because a) you’re naked, and b) it’s how babies are created?

There is a simple problem in our country:

Those who believe in God fail to honor science, and those who revere science find it necessary to turn their backs on God.

There seem to be relatively few people who understand that a Creative Father felt the need to establish an order through Mother Nature.

With that in mind, let’s address your question.

  • When do people mature sexually? Somewhere between the age of 13 and 15.
  • When do we think people should get married? Late twenties, or some folks even think early 30’s.

So in our culture there are fifteen years of sexual viability which is supposed to be stuffed away in a closet in preparation for marriage, or stumbled into through carnal experimentation made dangerous through immaturity and disease.

We really have to make up our minds. Are we going to continue to believe that people are children until they’re thirty, or are we going to establish an earlier emotional awareness to match the sexual awakening?

Sex is a big deal because people either pretend it’s sacred or just “a physical experience.” Since human beings may be the only species in which both male and female have the capacity for pleasure outside of procreation, we should probably emphasize the pleasure side of sexuality instead of insisting that God has belabored the girl with birth and the boy with “killing the game and dragging it back to the fire.”

What is sex? It is a physical experience producing a burst of pleasure which is also used by our species for procreation.

So if you have no intention of procreating, then you should be looking for ways to tap the pleasure without becoming irresponsible.

If your intention is to procreate, then you probably need to do what all the animals on Earth do–find a way to nest with your mate to take care of your baby birds.

You have to make up your mind:

Are we just animals or is there more to us than that?

Are we just spiritual or do we possess a bit of animal?

Sexuality can never be casual because we’re not just tigers. It can also never be considered completely spiritual–it’s too easy to do and we really don’t do it any different from the monkeys.

So what’s the best answer for you?

Get a mature look at both your physical evolution and your emotional responsibility. You will never be able to have sex without having some inclination toward an emotional union.

Avoid the stupidity of the religious, who make the joining of the penis and the vagina some sort of holy oracle.

And also escape the worldly, who view it as a common crossroads of human interaction.

In the long run we will have to teach our children to mature more quickly–or else not be so concerned that they start “probing the parts.”

For after all, even the Pope knows that nobody’s going to arrive at twenty-nine years of age a virgin.

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Populie: With Age Comes Wisdom… September 24, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog

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baby and great grandma

“Old people know more.”

This is a popular assertion.

It is generally followed by the populie, “With that knowledge comes wisdom.”

Hold the presses on that one–or to make it more contemporary, don’t download.

The reason this populie is so accepted is that our country is becoming older and therefore desires a shortcut from the responsibility of productivity by stomping and stumping about birthdays.

The entertainment industry loves the populie because it creates generation gaps, where the conflict between age groups can be exaggerated to create humor or drama for the viewer.

Politics really touts it because it generates a new demographic they can pander to in order to gain votes.

It is especially comical in religion. Even though we live in an American society which has removed the basic tenets of the patriarchal system, we still continue to insist that Mom and Dad submit to Grandma and Grandpa, and the children should be in submission to all the above.

The only thing I can tell you about getting older is that you have lived more days and been exposed to more events, which gives you the chance to be of more benefit.

But the important factor is how we react to these events. There are three typical scenarios of reaction:

1. I resist.

Even though the evidence is quite available, I am still going to thumb my nose at the change I see, which seems to require expansion, while I would like to remain “status in my quo.”

Young or old, if you take this position, you will maintain an adolescent immaturity. It’s that four-year-old face on a seventy-two-year-old woman, communicating, “I don’t like broccoli.”

2. I avoid.

Once fear has taken root in your heart, you become quite good at politely refusing to try new things, indulge in new things, consider new things, accept new things or tolerate the notion that new things are even necessary.

There are many people we consider to be kind, but actually are entrenched in trepidation about moving forward. They avoid all atmospheres where such stimulation would be promoted.

3. I learn.

Now, this connotes that you are willing to attempt things that kick you in the butt from time to time. You also will need to pick yourself up, garner available data and grow.

As you can see, this concept is not bound by the accumulation of years, but rather, is a state of mind which hungers and thirsts for righteousness.

When I sit in front of an audience of people and share my feelings, I am not segmenting the folks into various demographics and age groups. I am looking for a light in their eyes which has not been doused by rejection and avoidance.

Age does not give us wisdom.

What gives us wisdom is losing our fear of knowledge, and beginning to understand that what is emotional, spiritual and mentally stimulating in our lives is in progress–not a one-time infusion.

Without desiring these fresh-bread experiences, we all eventually fall into the repetition of our upbringing, and end up imitating those who gave us birth and hearth.

So let us address the populie by saying that wisdom is not a by-product of passing years, but rather, an openness to one another and God.

If you want to gain that wisdom, you should find what you have that works, joyously learn what works that you don’t have, and then be “journey-wise” by keeping the door open.

 

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How Does It Feel? … October 6, 2013

Jonathots Daily Blog

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  • college playerWhat do you think?
  • What do you believe?
  • What do you do?

These seem to be the three questions constantly bandied about in our society as a way of expressing our maturity, growth and aspirations.

I disagree.

I contend that anyone who believes that human beings are really focused, controlled and guided by what they think, believe and do is probably working from very old information or following an inept social model.

We are creatures of feeling.

I know I talk about this a lot. I do it because our culture has moved into some sort of Zen idea that if we repress our feelings and focus on what we think, believe and do, we can overcome immaturity and silliness, thereby maintaining an enlightened path.

We just don’t work that way. We are creatures of heart.

Case in point: watching a football game last night, I realized that our entire national sports organization somehow thinks that boys between the ages of nineteen and twenty-two are able to think, believe and work their way to victory. It’s comical.

They are kids and they are humans. So what do I know? They will perform at the level of what they feel. If they feel defeated, all the talent they have amassed will dissipate in tiny piles of frailty. If they feel overwhelmed, they will misplace their helmets, their brains will shut down and they will forget what they’re supposed to do on the next play.

So if you’re a good coach, you have to learn how to keep the emotions and feelings of your team generated in a direction of clean expression and follow-through.

Also, you can’t tell me that in the midst of this government shut-down, that we are running our political arena by what we think, believe and know to do. We have sixty-five-year-old men and women who do not like each other and are willing to rob the purses of innocent Americans to make their point.

That said, how can we transform our beings into more efficient and intelligent units, who address our feelings instead of pretending they’re not there?

1. Listen to yourself. “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” Is there a harshness to your tone? Is there desperation in your words? Has judging others entered into your profile? Your mouth will not lie because it will express the abundance of your heart–a great barometer of your emotions, and therefore, your productivity.

2. When is the last time you aired your feelings? Have you recently told someone of your frustrations, misgivings or confusion? Or are you keeping it to yourself?

Here’s the truth: human emotions have no storage area.

If you don’t release them in a fruitful way, they will dribble into your spirit, your mind and your work.

3. Do you feel that silence is a sign of maturity? Or can you be honest and admit you just don’t think you’re being heard by anyone? If you go to bed at night wondering why something isn’t working without ever verbalizing your concern, you are confusing your brain, causing it to forget; a self-righteous spirit which judges others with a hammer, and a body that has more aches than you can imagine.

How does it feel?

I’m going to church this morning. It doesn’t matter what I think about church; it doesn’t matter what I believe about church. It doesn’t even matter what I do at church.

It matters what I feel about thinking, believing and doing church.

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