Ask Jonathots … September 10th, 2015

 Jonathots Daily Blog

(2688)

I am a fourteen year old boy and have a little brother who is 8. I may sound like a whiner, but my parents act like he can do no wrong. If he breaks something, it’s my fault because I let him pick it up. If he wants more time on X-Box, I have to give it to him. When I say they’re not being fair, they say that I should be mature enough to understand that he’s just 8. But he’s turning into a brat and I’m getting mad. What can I do?

Being fourteen years old, let me clue you into a valuable lesson. You are old enough and smart enough to understand that not every problem in life can be resolved. Matter of fact, true maturity is understanding that most problems in life get handled by being avoided.

The situation with your little brother is very simple–he is secretly your fan, but could never express that without coming across as appreciative or loving. So instead, he follows you around and try to take over what you are doing or what you’re playing with so that he can be close to you but also dominate the situation.

Since your parents believe that he is the younger and therefore weaker brother and you should adjust your life to him, then you should be smart enough to adjust what you do to control his attitudes.

For instance, if you’re not interested in playing X-box, then sit down and start playing it and let him come and take it away from you. Then go do what you really wanted to do.

You may even want to explain to your mother and father what you’ll be doing, so that they can note that your little brother may have the problem of just wanting to be aggravating instead of desiring to be involved.

You can’t stop a little brother who wants to be annoying. What you can do is channel his interest in a direction that you’ve selected, and trap him in his own decision to pursue it.

Let me give you another quick example.

Let’s say you want to watch a show on TV that comes on at 4 o’clock in the afternoon. Here’s what you know–if you try to watch this show and your little brother knows it’s your favorite, he may decide to be mean-spirited about it, come in and change the channel, and then hide behind your mother’s interference.

So if your goal is to watch the show, make a plan to get him involved in something else. And then explain to your mother that you plan on watching this show, so that she can see your little brother in action.

You will never solve this problem by trying to change your brother’s attitude or by disciplining him yourself.

Get him to focus on what you want him to focus on, and then maybe he’ll leave you alone. If he doesn’t, make sure your mom and dad know what your intentions are, so they can see the little fella being selfish.

Parents tend to support the weaker child in a family. Honestly, it’s not terribly intelligent. Weakness is not strengthened by being supported, but rather, by being challenged.

So help your mom and dad understand that you are dealing with a little brother who is trying to be aggravating to get attention. Do this by trapping him in a situation where he shows his true colors. Then your parents will do the rest.

Remember, the key in life is not to out-muscle problems … the key is to out-smart them.

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Confessing … June 6th, 2015

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2604)

V.

I confess so I can heal.

If I deny, I remain sick.

Being 16 years of age, I was thrilled.

The principal of our high school had agreed to let our music group perform at an assembly for the entire student body.

I was pumped–with a side of arrogance.

I arranged for the custodian to meet me at the school very early that morning so I could get in, set up the equipment and make everything perfect.

I also decided to bring along my 9-year-old brother so he could help me carry stuff and be my legs, running around from place to place.

But when I arrived at the school there was no janitor anywhere and the building was locked.

Fearing that my dear friend who swept the halls might be late for our appointment, I had taken the precaution the previous day of going into the basement of the high school, where they kept the boiler room, and unlocking a window which faced out to the parking lot.

I was so proud of myself.

This was another reason I had brought my little brother–the window was only big enough for him to slide through.

So I went over, opened the window and gradually eased him down, holding onto his hand, thinking that certainly his feet would touch the ground on the furnace room below.

They didn’t.

He was scared and started to cry, so I released his hand.

He fell a few feet to the ground and bumped his head on the wall. Once again, tears ensued.

I yelled at him, told him to go up and open the door so I could get in.

When the janitor finally did show up, I was nearly set up. With an angry tone and furrowed brow he asked me how I got into the school. I explained that it was really weird, but apparently somebody left the door open. He didn’t believe me, but he also couldn’t prove I was wrong.

After I got set up it was time to take my little brother to the elementary school. On the way I told him to keep his moiuth shut about us entering the school and him bumping his head. He promised he would.

But during the day he got a headache, so Mom had to come pick him up–and all the beans were spilled.

She yelled for a while, calling me inconsiderate and selfish. Honestly I didn’t care. The concert at the school went great.

Until writing this essay today, I had not done a whole lot of thinking about that incident simply because my lies weren’t punished, my meanness to my brother was not revealed and it all came off beautifully.

But it does make me wonder if any of that self-righteous deception is still inside me.

Am I willing to cheat to get what I want if I know what I want is a good thing?

I hope the years have taught me that honesty is not a wimp sitting in the corner waiting to be bullied by the lying crowd, but rather, an intelligent student with a secret–knowing that when all things pan out, he will be the valedictorian.

 

 

The producers of jonathots would humbly request a yearly subscription donation of $10 for this wonderful, inspirational opportunity

***************************

NEW BOOK RELEASE BY JONATHAN RICHARD CRING

WITHIN

A meeting place for folks who know they’re human

 $3.99 plus $2.00 S&H

 

$3.99 plus $2.00 S & H