Sit Down Comedy … September 13th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Sit Down Comedy

The government the forefathers envisioned–being of the people, for the people and by the people—has devolved into a puzzle of political pandering.

Perhaps the worst part of the scenario is that those people the government was supposed to serve have accepted the bastard that’s been birthed and deemed America.

This has primarily been brought about by the assertion that the more complicated a thing is, the greater the chance that it will succeed.

So imitating the worst parts of former kingdoms which had emperors, senators, dignitaries and conquering, we have accumulated a history of pursuing a dream which has gradually left us sleepless.

America has boiled down to three P’s

  1. Party

The political party you identify with, which means you concede to accept the universal platform

  1. Plans

How can we make it seem that we’re addressing the difficulties in our nation and the world around us, without ever explaining step-by-step, how it will be initiated day by day?

  1. Personality

We are obsessed with rooting for our candidate-tainted-with-scandal while condemning your candidate-tainted-with-scandal.

Our leaders should be selected on the following:

A. Could we work side-by-side with them on a job?

B.  Could we work for them if they were our boss?

C.  When problems arise, what demeanor do they take on?

There’s the word: demeanor

The Presidency, the Senate and the House of Representatives should be voted in based on the demeanor of the candidates who will need to mull great quandaries yet find ways to simplify them for immediate attention.

So what is meant by demeanor? It begins with one simple principle:

Don’t attack

If you feel the need to bring down your adversary in order to make yourself look strong, then you do not possess the demeanor to be part of the leadership of this great country. Therefore, the people with the correct demeanor also:

Refuse to retaliate

For such defensiveness is a sign of avoiding looking foolish instead of persevering with great ideals.

Case in point: Does anyone think we are doing good in the Middle East?

The argument presented is that “bad things will happen if we leave.” We should pose a question: Since we know what we’re doing is foul and we don’t know that leaving will make it worse, why do we continue to stubbornly pursue the inefficient?

We are led by people who first attack and then retaliate.

You should not vote for anyone based on their policies or their political party. Ask yourself if you could work with them, if you could work for them and if he or she carries a pleasant disposition, seeking ways to solve problems instead of losing perspective and exacerbating the situation.

A leader of the United States of America must possess the wisdom and wit to have good cheer.

It was not Thomas Jefferson, John Adams or George Washington that launched our country in the correct direction. What held everything together in the beginning was what we need now:

The congenial cleverness of Benjamin Franklin

Franklin never saw a problem where he didn’t create an invention. He couldn’t even stand to watch lightning without inviting it down to explain itself. This is what we need.

Our candidates are pugnacious.

It is exactly the opposite of what makes good leadership for democracy.

So when I watch the debates or I look at Washington, D. C., I ask myself, could I work side by side with this person? If he or she were promoted, could I enjoy them as my boss? And, are they looking for a simple answer to begin the journey to completion, while maintaining a sense of “all is well” with good cheer?

 

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1 Thing You Can Do to Freshen Your Endurance

 

Take the Garbage Out More Frequently

I suppose it is nearly a family tradition to have one moment of time each day when the garbage is removed from the container, tied off at the top and carried out to the can, to await the arrival of that special man or woman who does us the great service of toting it someplace far away, where we never have to worry about it again.

The only problem with that plan is that sometimes, thrown into the pail, are the remains of a fish dinner, chopped-up onions or any array of discarded items from the kitchen that have no intention of leaving this Earth without stinking up the joint.

If you decide to wait until garbage removal time, these “putrids” can leave a lasting impression on your house for days to come.

Likewise, in our times, the sacred issue not being addressed has nothing to do with lying, politics, school shootings, immigration or climate control, but rather, the question, how can we dispose of these odious issues once they’ve invaded our house through the 24-hour news cycle and then decide to hang around, making everything stinky-poo?

God knows there’s nothing I can do to prevent garbage from coming my way.

But I can certainly bag it up and get it out of my presence as quickly as possible.

This is how, as mature, competent humans, we must survive this era of fantasy and horror.

So for every five-minute news story I hear telling me of doom and gloom, I need to spend ten minutes with my family, enjoying a sweet season of silly.

For every two hours binge-watching an apocalyptic mini-series, I need to allow myself a chance to go in another room and create something—anything except digging a bomb shelter.

Garbage comes.

The trick is knowing when to take it out—how quickly to get it away from your life, so the smell doesn’t linger in your kitchen and cling to your living area.

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Sit Down Comedy … August 30th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Sit Down Comedy

The eyes pop open and the feet are heading toward the floor—it’s the beginning of another day. Right there, in this pivoting moment, you get the message.

A feeling sweeps over your body, informing you where you are and threatening to control your whole living space.

Stop rushing.

With your still feet on the floor, ask yourself a question—out loud, if you’re alone:

How do I feel?

Don’t be surprised if the answer comes back, “Shitty.” Or maybe, “Great.” It could be, “I’m not sure.”

Unfortunately, many people believe it is wrong to run your life by how you feel.

Since educational systems are very similar for all of us, our religions don’t differ that much and our politics bluster controversy but don’t render anything unique, what ends up setting us apart are feelings.

Please do not think you can control your existence through “mind over matter.”

You aren’t a goddamn Ninja and you certainly don’t have a sword.

The best and the worst you’ve got are your emotions. Therefore, speak the question, “How do I feel?” Make it your morning drill.

Then, when you get the answer, ask a second question:

Why do I feel this way?

Sometimes it’s because you watched a scary movie before you went to bed, or you have to pay a bill or take a test. Or maybe you spent your nighttime hours eating like a four-year-old in a candy store.

You will be surprised that the physical, psychological and even spiritual can often hijack your feelings. Identify the reasons.

This is what I refer to as a S.O.D.—a sense of dread.

Something is going to come up that you don’t want to come up and you’re frightened about how it’s going to come down.

It won’t be resolved by a good breakfast. You can’t get the shower hot enough. Playing music in the background has limited possibilities.

Make note:

You aren’t living a life—you are learning to masterfully maneuver your emotions.

And by maneuver, I mean find them, identify their source and open yourself up to other people. Yes, never be afraid, when you emerge from your room in the morning, and someone asks you how you feel, to speak the truth out loud.

“Physically I’m pretty good, mentally I’m a little scattered and for some reason I’m a little nervous.”

This statement is for your benefit–because we gain power and healing as human beings when we confess who we are openly.

So let’s review:

First question: How do I feel?

Second question: Why do I feel this way?

Confession: Based upon what I know thus far, these are my beginning sensations today.

Candidly, if you try to ignore your starting feeling, you will fail the day. On the other hand, if you identify the feeling, you will receive a much greater sense of well-being. Once you know how you really feel, have figured out the source of it, and you’ve confessed it out loud—either to yourself or someone else—then you’re ready for the door.

Sometimes it’s a door in, and sometimes a door out.

But many of us ruin our morning, still bleary-eyed and uncertain. We’re not maneuvering our emotions, and we miss the door. But if you know how you feel and you’ve identified where it came from and you’ve confessed your profile, then you’ll see the door in or the door out.

It’s probably one of the most exciting things—and one of the most unexplainable happenings in our lives.

A way is made for us if we are ready to see the door.

Then, once you see the it and you have yourself primed, enter the door. Change, adapt, include, evolve. When you do these things, you find yourself in greater unity with the world around you instead of going into situations kicking and screaming, blaming others and eventually laying it at the doorstep of God.

So find the door in or out, then change—happy that you’ve alerted yourself. And finally you end the day grateful.

There is a much better chance that you will wake up the next morning feeling better if you end your day grateful.

It’s not luck. It’s not chaos. And by the way, God does not have a wonderful plan for your life.

This is your space and your doing. If you want to do it with power, begin each day with, “How do I feel and why do I feel that way?”

Then confess, look for the door in or out, change, and move toward the solution.

And finish it off by giving a big chuckle in gratitude.

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1 Thing Every Political Candidate Fails to Do but You Can Overcome

 

MAKE THE TRANSITION ON YOUR POSITION

Yes, the healthiest way to live life and be current, successful and relevant is to develop the “with and therefore” philosophy:

  1. With the information provided to me
  2. And my understanding of human nature, I
  3. Therefore support the following

Politicians are so afraid of changing their premises that they break their promises.

We constantly evolve through new data. Even human nature is experiencing growth—so therefore, we occasionally have a revision to our provision and a transition to our position.

Without this, we can find ourselves stubbornly ignorant.

After all, the two deadly doors to ignorance are:

A. Refusing to learn

B. Refusing to change

You end up looking just as ridiculous when you won’t change as you do standing in the corner, rejecting learning.

It doesn’t matter whether you’re a politician or not—you must prepare for the fact that information is still being gathered.

Likewise, human nature is in flux.

So therefore, what we begin and how we begin it will certainly need to shift as we go.

If we pass laws with the awareness that new amendments, new additions and even sometimes repeal may be necessary, we would be in a mature profile to face the real problems of our times.

It doesn’t matter whether the issue is abortion, capital punishment, war, immigration, or a thousand other matters. Each one has factual information—a reading from the present humans on Earth—and therefore allows us to make a start of things.

If we take this approach of “with and therefore” we keep ourselves in the game and admit that a good part of our journey is about learning how to be a better Earthling.

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1 Thing You Can Do to Help Turn the Tide on the Madness

 

Conversation is whiskey and humor is beer.

Please don’t forget this.

In the midst of all the insanity, there is a tendency to talk until we cheapen ourselves, and debate to debunk the ignorant.

Although it may be dramatic to crinkle one’s face and produce crocodile tears about the tragedies of shootings and the general unrest in our communities, we achieve nothing through our furor of discourse.

We become inebriated on our sense of importance.

Then we start using our words to slur others.

I am sure many Americans would consider it insulting to allow good cheer, wit, cleverness, optimism and mirth to rule the day.

Yes, mirth. There’s a word we don’t use much anymore—probably because it means amusement that brings laughter. What could possibly be uplifting or comedic about the horror of El Paso and the victims of Dayton?

Nothing.

But we can keep our sense of humor by realizing that this is a nation of 350 million people, who have been told they have the right to do too much and have been slammed together from cultures all over the world, in a climate of permissiveness. We might ready ourselves for some conflict.

For to compare our country to other nations is a farce. No other group of people must tolerate such diversity—and do it promising to initiate “peace on Earth, goodwill toward man.”

We need the common beer of humor to sooth us and give us a reason for chatting again instead of yelling.

The whiskey of politics, religion, corporations and ego will do nothing but make us completely oblivious to anything but our own ideas.

I bring humor.

I find humor—not jokes and laugh-out-loud sketches, but instead, poking fun at ridiculous ideas instead of pretending they have merit. For instance, attempts to get rid of guns, or stances to protect them, are equally comical. Joining in “the blame game” and pointing fingers like little children only proves what babies we are.

We need humor.

We need to share the beer of a sense of good cheer.

So here’s to mirth. May we not only learn its meaning but begin to utilize its power.

Prepare for a rebirth of mirth on the Earth.

 

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Sit Down Comedy … August 9th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

(4131)


Nonsense is not the absence of sense, but it certainly is a denial that common sense is readily available, so opinions, doctrines, philosophies, political platforms and social mores must be invented to counter the fact that we have decided to pretend that sense has abandoned us.

Common sense is well and fine. Fine and well it is.

It is alive, though a bit startled by attacks.

I, for one, am not prepared to accept nonsense simply because it’s being voiced loudly or large numbers of “likes” can be authenticated from a website.

I believe many things can be said, and many things can be implemented in various stylings. But there are three things I must hear clearly represented in any manifesto passed my way. If these three things are absent, I have no intention of attacking anyone or forbidding their right to be verbal.

But I also will not back them, agree with them or wave some universal flag of truce, while pretending the ideas have good sense.

Let me stop with this lengthy preamble to tell you this trinity of affinity.

Three things that ring my bell

  1. All are treasured. Some with greater value. Others more needy. Yet all counted.
  2. What we do is much more spirited than what we say.
  3. Any sense of needing to judge must be immediately replaced with a roaring baptism of good cheer.

There they are.

And don’t try to trick me by insisting that you “basically” concur but find exceptions in a couple of places.

After all, people are either all counted, or none of us matter.

And what we do is much louder than what we speak.

And judging someone—whether you insist a book told you to do so or not—can only be defined as verbal shit.

Going forward, this is my standard. You can see, it opens the door to many religions, political candidates and social structures. You also notice that it slams the door to many as well.

From this point going forward, I will not participate in nonsense.

The only sense I will recognize is common.

 

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Cracked 5 … July 6th, 2019

Jonathots Daily Blog

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Cracked 5

What to Do with Leftover July 4th Crap

 A. Use remaining sparklers as nightlights in baby nursery

 

B. Use hamburger buns as mini-frisbees

 

C. Set off firecrackers to frighten termites

 

D. Potato salad tacos!!

 

E. Argue politics with your neighbor, who noticed that the flag you hung up near your mailbox was not standard military design and size.

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