PROMISES ARE NOT PROMISING
Though for a brief moment, our pride swells, our hopefulness inflates and our prowess among our fellow-humans may appear to soar, promises leave us with a single difficulty:
WE MUST DELIVER OR WE WILL START LYING
Once we start lying we can’t be trusted. When we are not trusted, we are eventually relegated to a position where people are willing to dine with us but not work with us.
The difficulty with promises is that they become two desolate deserts if we fail to deliver the goods: arrogance and foolishness.
Arrogance because we said we would be able to accomplish something and not only shared our intent but sealed it with the covenant of a promise.
Foolish because everyone wonders why we didn’t account for the thing that brought our plans down.
Yet we continue to promise that we’re going to give the money, win the game, be there on time and even be faithful until death do us part.
There’s nothing that makes us look more ridiculous than an unfulfilled promise, but people continue to feel the need to look powerful while ending up with a powerless claim. Society promotes arrogance–but we are all drawn to humility.
We expect people to overlook our foolishness although wisdom is regarded as a higher virtue.
If you want to do better, stop saying “I promise.” Instead, reply, “I think I understand what needs to be done. Here’s where my ability lies, and it’s available if you’d like me to take a shot at it.”
Nobody ever won a game, won a love, won the lottery or won salvation by making a promise.
So if you want to gain strength or be perceived as intelligent, offer what you have with humility, and apply it with wisdom.
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