Ask Jonathots… June 30th, 2016

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When should children be told about sex? What do you think is the right age for a woman or a man to first have sex? Do you think couples should wait until they’re married? In other words, what constitutes a healthy attitude about sex?

Normally it would be difficult to answer three questions.

But let’s be candid–sex is about choice. The more choice you can involve in your sexual experience, the better off you are. Unfortunately, the present system, which is overly promiscuous in its entertainment and puritan in its educational approach, actually fails to teach the joy of choice.

For example, because children are not monitored well or instructed about their bodies, they often have their first sexual encounter by “playing doctor” or being abused by a relative.

Likewise, high school, which is really just a glorified bar scene, with people looking for ways to hook up and have an affair, leaves most students pressured to do things they have not selected.

So by the time people enter the adult world, they are either so confused or over-sexed that they don’t feel the compulsion for romantic encounters with their mate.

So in one way we revere sexuality, focusing on childish concepts by giggling and pointing, and on the other side we fail to realize the deep emotional and even physical pleasures of the experience because we were not taught how to make intelligent decisions.

I believe that children should be told about sexuality just as soon as their friends start tattling about it. I think the discussion should fall into three categories:

A. This is how your body works.

B. This is what you want to get off of the experience.

C. Therefore, these are the choices available.

As to your second question, it is rather doubtful that people will wait until they get married to have sex. That would be the ultimate choice made by a very mature individual who had selected a profile of virginity for his or her own advantage.

In other words, you will not hold back the burst dam of hormones simply by quoting scriptures or signing a pledge card. In that case people stumble into having “accidental” sex, which can be interpreted to mean more than it actually should.

Concerning a right age for having sex, we are all over the spectrum on this issue.

For instance, we have decided that a person is old enough to drive at sixteen, to vote at eighteen, and to drink at twenty-one. But the likelihood that they will involve themselves in sex before sixteen is very high.

So which one is actually more involved? Driving at fourteen, voting at fourteen, drinking at fourteen or having sex at fourteen?

When I raised my sons, I assumed that they were going to be pushed into sexual awareness by about fourteen or fifteen years of age. That does not mean this is the ideal age to have sex–but it does mean that every parent should be aware when the pressure mounts.

To have a healthy sexual attitude at any age, three things need to be in place:

  1. Wisdom about your own body
  2. Wisdom about your own choices
  3. Wisdom about all consequences

If those are in order, the door is opened for people to choose their romantic encounters, instead of being coerced into them by peer pressure, church regulation or just too much chance.

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telePATHy … June 3, 2012

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“A Christian nation.”

That phrase is often thrown around–especially in political seasons–as evidence of the good intentions and mission of the United States of America. Actually, it would be valuable to the world if there were a country which followed the principles and heart’s desire of Jesus of Nazareth. It would help to create a better world view and with the dialogue between nations. But in the history of the USA are Puritans, slavery and settlers. It infiltrates our thinking with concepts of judgmentalism, feeling superior to others and settling for less than our very best.

I’m not trying to connote that these three blemishes on our record comprise the spirit that inhabits our country. But they linger. In our historical photo album there are snapshots of these notorious cousins and illegitimate children.

If we want to gain true spirituality and a world view which will place us in a position of true power, granted because of wisdom, we must counteract the Puritan part of our history by initiating good apathy. “Don’t judge or you will be judged–and the measure you put on other people will be put back on you.” That’s good apathy.

And if we want to overcome the stain of slavery, it would be of great benefit to pursue empathy. “NoOne is better than anyone else.” Feeling superior is the best way to start a fight and feeling inferior is the best way to lose one.

If we want to sidestep a tendency to be merely settlers, it will be necessary for us to have sympathy. “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.” It is just an understanding that before we snatch something away from another person or force our will into any given situation, we must have a burst of conscience which projects our own feelings into the dilemma so that we understand how the other person will surely respond.

Can I tell you this? If you don’t judge other people, remaining apathetic to their choices, and you refuse to believe you’re better than the folks around you and you show mercy, knowing that it’s the only way to obtain it for yourself, you could live successfully in any country of the world. There are no laws against such choices. On the other hand, if you’re a Puritan who has an opinion on everything, with a history of owning slaves in your own family (which you deny) and you tend to settle for things without considering other people’s feelings, you will quickly become an enemy in any culture.

Now, there is a final gift imparted to those souls who actually develop the apathy to stop judging, the empathy to never feel superior and the sympathy to show mercy to others. Once you allow those three things into your life you are bestowed telepathy. The definition? “Communication from one mind to another.” We usually tie it to extra-sensory perception, but it really isn’t. Once you free your mind of the time-absorbing activities of judging others, establishing your superiority and figuring out how you’re going to settle in and take someone else’s portion, your brain has the capacity to feel and sense what’s needed next.

Jesus referred to it as “going the second mile.” There are some people who not only do what is required of them but have the sensibility to know that a little extra added on for excellence will guarantee that the work doesn’t have to be done again and again. When you’re not judging other people it’s so much easier to notice what they really need or want. When you’re not thinking you’re better than another race or group of human beings, you can pause to consider what next lies on their path and how you can help. And when you’ve decided not to settle for what is available but instead, produce your own, your talents are heightened and you are prepared to do more without grumbling and complaining.

Yes, it is possible to communicate from one mind to another if those minds are not clouded by Puritan ideas, notions of slavery and settling for taking what isn’t yours.

This is the PATH:

  • Apathy: “I will not judge anyone else because I don’t want to be judged. I will not participate in gossip and criticism.”
  • Empathy:NoOne is better than anyone else.” To believe any other philosophy is an edict of war against the people we contend are our lessers.
  • Sympathy: “Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy.” Before I assume I have the right to take something, I should try those emotions on myself like a suit of clothing and see how they fit. And finally:
  • The gift of telepathy: Since our thinking is freed from the constriction of being an enemy of others, we can therefore be granted insight into their minds, which allows us to go the second mile and do more than expected instead of less.

The greatest gift you can give to your country as a patriot is to take on the true spirituality of Jesus and in the process, acquire a world view. If not, you will find yourself at the mercy of the ghosts of our past, which made us believe that women were witches, black men were monkeys and Native Americans were savages.

Find the PATH. Adhere to the PATH. Walk the PATH. Trust the PATH to take you to a sense of true spirituality and the great gift of emulating your Heavenly Father, who loved the whole world so much that He gave us the PATH.

 

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