Confessing … October 3rd, 2015

 Jonathots Daily Blog

(2711)

XXII.

I confess so I can heal.

If I deny, I remain sick.

One of the dangers of doing noble deeds is the human tendency to desire to be treated with some nobility for doing so.

Of course, it doesn’t work that way.

During my years of living in Tennessee, I was party to beginning an orchestra in our hometown. It went well. Matter of fact, doors were opened so that we could offer an entertaining and enlightening musical program to the local elementary schools using a small ensemble from the larger body.

This project was so successful that we were invited to present these programs at ten elementary schools in the Roanoke, Virginia, school district.

We were thrilled.

The first day we did four schools and everything went well. At the end of the second day, we were finishing up our program when a teacher in the back of the auditorium began to gather up her children like little chickadees in preparation to take them out to the bus for departure.

We were at the height of the most important part of our communication with the students, and in my pridefulness, I became incensed at her insensitivity. So as soon as we finished our last note and took our bows, I immediately stomped over to the young woman and confronted her over what I considered to be an egregious error on her part–ignoring our work merely to prepare her children.

I was not foul or mean, but very confrontational–and I did it in front of the students.

She was shocked, offended, and immediately went to her principal to “tell on me.”

So by the end of the day, the principal of the school had contacted our sponsor and informed him of my breach,. Meanwhile, I was being reinforced by my own team, who told me I was being “honest and brave, sticking up for myself,” in dealing with this lady.

So long story short, the sponsor of our event was so thrilled with what was going on that he forgave my indiscretion and we continued the school concerts without any further furor.

Matter of fact, to this day those closest to me would consider me to be justified. That young teacher probably marks it as the day she was accosted by an asshole.

What is the truth?

The truth of the matter is, true beauty does not need praise.

Excellence can continue to thrive minus applause.

And the message will get through without us over-promoting it.

I was wrong.

I was wrong to accost a young woman, no matter what her motivations were. My job is to work on my own motivations.

I was wrong to do it in front of her students, and I was wrong to take a pass simply because I have enough talent that people are afraid to confront me.

Have I ever been so overwhelmingly egotistical and defensive again?

I suppose I have.

But I have taken the time to put a hole in that tank of ego and let it gradually drain out onto the ground–where it belongs.

 

 

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ProbTwo… November 2, 2013

Jonathots Daily Blog

(2054)

Her name was Mrs. Talley.

She was my kindergarten teacher. Because our school district did not offer the class to the public, I enrolled in her private kindergarten, which was held in her home.

I learned so much from her. This delightful woman taught me how to take round-tipped scissors, cut, and then paste, color and even how to play.

Now, the second problem that is common to all of us is the overwhelming sensation that “it’s not enough.”

Once human beings insist that they’re deprived, it doesn’t take long for them to become depraved. If we’re convinced we’ve been cheated, left out or short-changed, we are willing to throw all ten commandments to the wind in order to get our fair share.

This is why you must stop yourself once you have the predilection to believe it’s not enough, and set a plan in motion which is different from “getting your due at all cost.”

To find this “good plan,” we must go back to kindergarten.

1. Cut.

In other words, if there’s not enough, is there any way we can cut our budget, diminish our need, or reassess our valuables to change our circumstances to the better? I realize this concept is foreign to both business and government, but sometimes it is possible to solve your problem by simply tightening your belt a little bit.

2. Paste.

Yes, intelligent people learn how to apologize to Peter for robbing from him because they can make a good case for helping Paul. New direction can often be found by simply putting off one piece of effort in favor of a greater necessity.

3. Color.

We are unattractive when we sit around and complain. I don’t think I would donate to a homeless person who approached me asking for funds by making the case on how he or she had been cheated.

Case in point: I once met such a person on the street who wanted to sell me a watch. He pulled it out of his dirty jacket and asked me if I would like to buy it. I admired his industrious nature and willingness to use commerce to improve his financial status, but the watch didn’t look terribly attractive displayed against his dingy coat. I told him I would give a donation if he would use part of it as an investment.

I said, “You need some color. Go to the fabric store and buy a foot of purple velvet, and when you show your watch the next time, lay it out on the purple velvet. The color will improve your possibilities.”

I don’t know if he did this or not, but I will tell you this–no one blesses someone who’s cursing.

Put a little color in your cheeks, and if you find yourself “without enough,” comb your hair, brush your teeth and put on a clean shirt if you want to improve your situation.

4. Play.

It is highly unlikely that you will be able to solve your problems by using your present resources. Even though we tend to hide out whenever we feel a lacking, the best thing to do is get around other people and open the doors to collaboration and cooperation.

I choose to become generous when I’m poor. Being generous when you’re rich is not really giving, just trimming. Reaching in your pocket and donating when you feel a little pinched yourself is allowing for men and women who see your generosity to “give back to you, good measure, pressed down and running over.”

So the next time you’re tempted to say “it’s not enough:”

• see what you can cut
• paste together resources from other places
• color your life with positive ideas
• play with others who might have an answer to your problem.

Mrs. Talley taught me a lot. I not only ended up learning how to make an elbow macaroni picture with Elmer’s glue, but also learned the basic ideas for overcoming my self-pity.

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