The Alphabet of Us: A is for Anger… December 8, 2014

  Jonathots Daily Blog

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All human beings possess a heart, a soul, mind and strength.

Nothing of any true significance can be achieved unless this is understood.

  • Trying to deal with our emotions by thinking our way out of the situation is doomed to failure.
  • Becoming emotionally involved with mathematical equations is equally sunk in the bog.
  • And ignoring our spirituality, hoping to physically dominate in every facet of our lives, is just downright exhausting.

Every human being gets angry. Beware of those who insist they don’t–they are ticking time bombs, having stuffed all of their frustration down inside, likely to explode at a most inopportune time.

Anger is an emotion. To take a class in anger management is the belief that we can control that emotion by using better thinking.

I must disagree. As an emotion, anger must be handled emotionally.

So in pursuing the alphabet of us, let’s look at how we should handle our anger:

1. Be verbal.

Emotions should not be trapped without speech. It is “out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks.” What you want to ensure is that you can speak in a climate where you don’t have to be judged by your adversary, but can sound off to a friend and hear your feelings expressed in syllables.

That’s right–practice. Rehearse your anger–in the mirror, to a friend, to God or to anyone who is not the source of your resentment.

2. Listen to yourself.

There is nothing worse than being in the middle of an argument and hearing yourself voice your misgiving for the first time, and suddenly realize how stupid it is. Then you’re stuck in the midst of a fight, with your pride trying to win the day.

Listen to yourself.

That’s why we need to be spiritual. It is the soul that gives us the ability to separate out the real complaint from the blown-up rendition.

3. Clear your head.

There’s only one way to renew your brain. Make sure you take all previous experiences and set them aside in favor of a fresh encounter.

That’s what clearing your head is. It’s offering a brand new pathway, to allow conversation to produce change.

4. And finally, choose what’s really important.

Before you go have that interface with a person who has upset you, find out the core issue. Keep your anger as small as you possibly can to make it easier for the person hearing your insights to comply.

The biggest mistake we make is separating our parts–heart, soul, mind and strength–and believing they have the power to act on their own.

They are a team. They perform best as a team.

And the only way to handle anger is to use their teamwork.

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Untotaled–Stepping 15 (August 17th, 1965): Mr. O … May 24, 2014

Jonathots Daily Blog

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(Transcript)

I called him Mr. O because he had a Norwegian name with five syllables that I could neither remember nor pronounce.

He was older than death.

What I mean is, his flesh was so gray and his movements were so slow that he appeared to be a creature coming from the grave instead of one inching towards the tombstone.

I didn’t like him. He didn’t like me.

I think our mutual displeasure began one day when I was mowing the lawn and the grass clippings blew onto his beautiful, graveled driveway. He came out of his house screaming at me, explaining that all I had to do was turn the mower around and pull it towards me, so that the clippings would go into my own yard.

Honestly, it sounded tedious, meaningless and frustrating.

So when I went inside and explained it to my mother and father, they had the opportunity to do something inspirational. They could have explained that since it was Mr. O’s driveway, he had the right to decide how it would be decorated.

But I guess they had problems with him, too. Because they rolled their eyes, called him a few choice names and walked away, leaving me to believe it was my family duty to continue to aggravate him.

So I did. I refused to mow in the direction he requested, blowing my grass across his well-kempt drive.

In retaliation, every time one of my balls rolled into his yard, he retrieved it and refused to give it back.

It was a feud.

It was ridiculous and could have been so easily handled if I had been instructed to give place to the feelings of another human being. But instead my childish sensations were justified instead of rectified.

I think my parents thought they were trying to be cool and side with their son. But I needed more than that.

I needed to learn how to live in a world that demands sharing.

Before I could grow up and become a decent human being, Mr. O passed away. So many things I would like to tell him.

  • For after all, Mr. O had the right to determine what came into his own yard.
  • Mr. O even had the right not to like me.
  • And I must realize that Mr. O had the God-given right to be cranky.

For after all, if I am going to be mean to everybody I don’t like or who doesn’t like me, I’m going to be too busy pursuing vendettas … to ever enjoy myself.

 

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After an appearance earlier this year in Surprise, Arizona, Janet and I were blessed to receive a “surprise” ourselves. Click on the beautiful Arizona picture above to share it with us!

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Finding a Message in a World aTwitter: Epilogue — Separate… December 14, 2012

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A very unusual word, simply because it changes its meaning based on how you pronounce it. If you pronounce “separate” as two syllables, it means to create a space apart from the teeming crowd. If you pronounce it as three syllables, the definition changes to become a decision to be away from others or other things. It is important to be separate (the two-syllable kind) but dangerous to separate (three syllable version).

As I near my birthday, I begin to think about my past year. Would it be all right with you if I tell you that I am thrilled with the results–without coming across as overbearing or arrogant? Because the source of my enthusiasm is not in my own accomplishments, but in the sense that I was able to be separate but not to separate.

It is the magical mystery of Jesus eating and drinking with sinners and through his presence of mind and focus of message, having the ability to turn those individuals away  from the revelry. That’s it.

The problem with organizations, religions, corporations and causes is that in an attempt to rally the troops under the banner of a single purpose, the agenda is often to make all participants feel that they are better than the world around them in some capacity, therefore needing to be evangelists to the ignorant masses.

You see, I have a message. I just don’t have a vendetta. I am separate without feeling the need to separate from my fellow-humans. I can sit in a room with people, completely enveloped in their present cultural predilections without feeling either left out or terribly critical of their choices.

What we discuss in this country is compromise, but what we need is purpose which is faithful enough to its own tenets to produce fruit, replenish the earth and include others. Unfortunately, at the seed of every movement is a love of a cause and a secret cult of hate for non-participants.

So the Republicans make fun of the Democrats for being aloof, snotty, bratty pseudo-intellectuals, while trying to present themselves as having a great love for this nation.

The Democrats portray the Republicans as bare-footed hillbillies with no sense of science, while simultaneously swearing that they are the possessors of a similar patriotic allegiance to our nation. Neither group is able to just put their hand to the plow and allow their philosophy to sprout branches and prove its worth. They want to argue their way into the marketplace instead of bringing wares worthy of purchase.

Don’t be like them.

I have found my message. In the process, I have discovered my traveling companions and my God. That particular combination enables me to make a difference–and it is this difference that I want people to see, not merely me parading around, insisting I’m different.

I live a separate life but I will never separate myself from my brothers and sisters. But if I don’t live that separate life, those who could be benefitted by my gifts will pass over me because I offer no different solutions that the ones they tout.

So there you go:

  • Find your message–people will follow.
  • Having discovered friends, worship a God who honors the message.
  • In doing so you will become happy–which, by the way, is the only sensible means to convey happiness.
  • And then, live a separate life without ever needing to separate.

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