Jonathots … January 15th, 2019

 


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handbook for touching

People decide whether they want to be touched by us by noticing how we handle our other four senses.

  • How do we look at things—the eyes?
  • How do we listen—the ears?
  • What do we think about the odors around us—the nose?
  • And do we enjoy new tastes—the tongue?

Truthfully, if you have nasty attitudes in at least two of these areas, you will notice that people will begin to pull away. Even if you’re in love, married or involved in a physical relationship, it will begin to cool.

For none of us want to be touched by a grouchy person, even though we would never articulate it in exactly that way. It’s why, when we’re little children, we run toward a gracious grandma and reluctantly hug a cranky grandpa.

We are human. Therefore, we have the seed of God in us. That seed demands watering—and the way we water our seed is by using our senses in a positive, Spirit-building way, so when it’s time for intimacy, people yearn for our touch.

When we open our eyes, do we see problems, difficulties, disaster, sinfulness and evil? Or are we looking for things that are promising? That alone makes us appealing. Simply to reject the darkness we see and find the light causes people to want to cuddle closer to us.

Do we listen to what’s going on around us, hear music and scrunch up our faces in disapproval, or do we boldly walk up when we hear glorious things and proclaim, “Sounds great.”

Once again, who wants to be around someone who complains about what they’re hearing?

If you want to win the favor of other humans, walk into the house and tell them it smells fabulous. Or you can walk in, sniff the air, twitch your nose twice in disapproval, and have them praying that you leave soon.

You’re invited to dinner and they offer you a food you’ve never tasted before—do you turn it down? Do you express your reluctance? Do you taste it and say, “Give me meat and potatoes?” Or do you partake and tell them what you like about it instead of what you hate about it?

Ninety percent of the reason that married people lose their affection for one another has nothing to do with physical touching. No, they simply get tired of seeing sour looks, hearing complaints about sound and pickiness over a smell, or the ongoing refusal to try anything new.

I want to touch.

I want to be touched.

Therefore, it is my responsibility to look for good things, to appreciate wonderful sound, to rejoice over fragrance and to be thankful for the variety of delicious tastes that the Creator has offered.

 

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Jonathots … December 18th, 2018


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handbook for touching

She approached her shopping cart, unwilling to put her hands on it until she had removed a wet-nap from her purse, full of, I assume, anti-biotic, anti-virus and anti-people juice. She cleaned off the apparatus before she began her shopping.

I apparently was caught staring because she turned to me with a snarl on her face and said, “Nasty stuff. Got to avoid the flu bug.”

Likewise, during the wintertime, I attended a church with a minister in full ceremonial garb. It came time for the “passing of the peace.” He paused and explained to the congregation, “I must ask you not to make contact with your hands with one another. Since it is the flu season, please find another way to express other than physical contact.”

A little gleeful spirit leaped in my soul–I love awkward situations, which certainly are rife with comedy. I watched the people–who didn’t know what to do. Some tried to “fist bump,” but let’s be honest. Fist bumping is certainly not conducive to the sign of peace. Most people just gave up and nervously waved.

Needless to say, even though this was popular for a few weeks, the mass of humanity eventually realized that since we’re all in this together, then “together we will sneeze and cough.”

Even though you can pass the flu bug by touching one another, you can also pass along blessing.

Are you frowning over that statement?

Just like you can’t see the bacteria or viruses that cause the flu it is equally possible that the energy, the kindness, the mercy and the tenderness in human hands are not visible either, but are passed through touch.

And candidly, even the flu bugs that people pass to us give us a fighting chance to manufacture anti-bodies which are much more likely to protect us from the flu than acting like the whole world around us is filled with lepers.

 

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Jonathots … December 11th, 2018


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handbook for touching

The light of the body is the eye

If the eye is evil, then the whole body is filled with darkness. But if the eye is clear, then the whole being can be illuminated.

Honestly, these words can sound like a bunch of gibberish if they’re not understood. This is the trouble with a lot of deep philosophy and passages that insist they are “spiritual.”

Let me phrase it this way:

Your eyes belong to you, but what you see was programmed by others.

Even though you may insist that you are the master of your own thinking and the manipulator of your vision, there is so much programming that’s gone into you–from childhood, schooling, experiences, defeats, failures and pain–which clouds your vision and only presents the images that memory will offer.

We are very critical of prejudice, but the fact of the matter is, nearly all of our preconceived ideas are deeply ingrained within our consciousness long before we have a chance to vote on whether to accept them or not.

This affects our touch.

If we don’t like what we see, we don’t want to get near it. If we don’t want to get near it, we avoid it and fear it. And once we’ve decided that someone or some group is foreign, then it becomes necessary for us to rationalize our choice by attempting to prove that the forbidden topic, race, religion, gender or sexual orientation is hampered by evil.

Thus, white people who grow up in a bigoted environment really do think the black race looks a bit like monkeys. That’s how they were taught to see them. Therefore, that’s how they view them. The end result is, they decide not to be around them and the unity brought on by touch is forsaken.

Likewise, black parents who teach their children that Latinos are lazy and not to be trusted raise children that purposely avoid anyone with light brown skin, unless there’s enough pigment to welcome them as black brothers and sisters.

Also, the Latinos do it with the Asians, and within their own culture, assuming that Cubans are better than Dominicans, and Asians assuming that Chinese are superior to Japanese.

Once our eyes have been fitted with a pair of glasses by our upbringing, making us see the world in a certain way, then our bigotry becomes a spectacle.

Because once we’re afraid–once our “eyeballing” of other human beings promotes darkness in our minds, we are certainly not going to want to be near them, to shop with them, to go to church with them or to ever risk touching them.

Without touch there is no fellowship. Without fellowship there is no commonality, and without commonality, there is alienation.

Take some time during this Christmas season to consider the vision you have of life–the way you see those around you.

Are you controlling your own perception? Or do you have people you were taught were “untouchables?”

Because if you’re not willing to touch people with the tenderness of your hands, you will certainly end up fighting them with your fists.

 

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Jonathots … December 4th, 2018


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Jonathan's Handbook of Hands

Dusting for prints

It’s done at the scene of a crime. (Well, of course, I’m working off my limited knowledge of criminology based upon years of watching cop shows.)

The investigators are looking for finger prints–evidence that one specific person was specifically at this place, specifically involved in a specific way in what transpired–what they refer to as “a person of interest.”

God gave each and every one of us a brain and it is up to us to decide how to use our hands. At the end of those hands are fingers, with tips.

Fingertips.

Our aspiration is to define the way we touch things, the way we handle matters and the way we conduct business, so that when the room is dusted for evidence, our mark, our distinction and our passion will be left behind with our uniqueness.

But since your true contact is touch,you might want to consider what fingerprints you leave behind when you exit a situation.

I have three–a trio of noticeable marks that I want to remain after I’ve left the room. I want people to know that I’ve been there by the touch of my contribution. These are:

  • No worry
  • No hurry
  • No judge and jury

I want to make sure when I walk into situations that my touch removes the need to worry.

I also want people to know that I’m not trying to run in and run out quickly, contributing as little time as possible for a potential solution.

And I certainly want everybody to know when they receive my touch that I am no judge and I am no jury of their heart and soul.

These are the fingerprints I want to leave behind from the hands that contain my touch. I want people to know I was in the room. I’m a person of interest.

Because of that, my touch will always include no worry, no hurry and no judge and jury.

 

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Jonathots … November 13th, 2018


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Jonathan's Handbook of Hands

We are sensual.

Though many proponents insist on portraying us cerebral or spiritual, when it comes time for follow-through, we are infrequently sensible and rarely angelic.

We strive for it. Sometimes we overwork our brains to the point of worry, or we contort our spirits in all forms of prayer and worship until we become obnoxious–even to ourselves.

WE ARE SENSUAL

There are five of them:

  • seeing
  • hearing
  • smelling
  • tasting

All of these four senses are located in our own heads–and that is candidly where we live most of the time. We focus on what we’ve seen, heard, the aromas we enjoy and the tastes that tickle our palates.

The only thing that even hints that we are not merely part of the animal kingdom is the fifth sense–touch.

We experience this when we leave our own thoughts, extend our arms and decide to use our hands.

It’s when the cerebral and spiritual are invited into our sensual control center to contribute something more expansive–inclusive.

THE POWER OF TOUCH

Therefore, if we don’t know how to use our hands–if our touch is either absent or brutal–then the four senses that dwell within the cranium will make us self-centered and certainly encourage isolation.

We were supposed to learn all of this when we were kids. Mom, Dad, relatives, older siblings, Grandpa, Grandma, aunts, uncles and even schoolteachers were there to instruct us on how to “handle” other human beings.

But what if we didn’t learn? What if the instruction was vague? What if we were encouraged by others–or by our own inclinations–to trust our other four senses, and leave touch to chance, or lust?

Is there any hope for the human race if we live our entire lives inside our minds, and fail to learn the power of touch?

What am I supposed to do with my hands?

When should I be “hands on?”

How about “hands off?”

What is the correct time to join hands?

Should we fold our hands in prayer?

Should we give a “hand up” to others?

These are all great questions.

Over the next multiple weeks, I would like to invite you to the Handbook on Hands–an opportunity to study our sensual selves, and find the cerebral and spiritual reasons to use our touch elegantly.


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PoHymn: A Rustling in the Stagnant … May 4th, 2016

 Jonathots Daily Blog

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PoHymn Oh God

Oh, God

Someone wants to touch me

Chilling

A kiss is near my lips

Exhilarating

A friend has chosen to remain

Invigorating

An embrace warms me

Breathtaking

Eyes gazing at me with passion

Trembling

A whisper of warmth on my cheek

Seduction

The fragrance of a lover aroused

Edenic

Slowly gliding toward connection

Spinning

A fevered sweat tingling on my brow

Heated

Hands seeking healing affection

Probing

Persistent, yearning, heart-pounding

A ragged breath

Lingering, mingling, enjoining

Treasuring

Sweeter, rhythmic, faster

Saturated

Panting, groping…release

Oh, God

Thou art mindful

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ProbThree: “It’s not my fault” … November 3, 2013

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Uncle SamFingers.

They perform two obvious functions: touch and point.

Touching is good. It’s a way of expressing our tenderness by putting our emotion into our fingertips. Pointing is when we try to place the blame on someone or something other than ourselves. We do this in three ways:

1. Pointing up.

Sometimes we feel so inadequate, inferior, ill-prepared and ignorant that we place all of our life concerns and journey needs on God in the sky, hoping for divine intervention. We use prayer to pass the buck to our heavenly Father. So we either procure our miracle or we get to act persecuted for the lack of attention.

Belief in God should build our character, not diminish it. It should make us more willing to serve ourselves and others instead of turning us into lazy supplicaters who feel that God has a responsibility to support us–since He fathered us.

2. Pointing down.

Some people, when they discover they don’t want to blame God anymore, decide to finger Satan, Lucifer or evil, which they can point down toward as the source of their failures. It is the ultimate superstition. Not only does it unrighteously free us of our own task and involvement, but it places good and evil on an equal footing and gives darkness too much light.

3. Pointing out.

This is very popular. When in doubt, accuse someone else. When confronted with deficiency, explain your indebtedness by insisting that another person has caused you to be a debtor. It is vindictive for two reasons: (a) it takes away the joy of achieving for ourselves, and (b) it often targets people we don’t like as adversaries, when those who really ARE against us are given a free pass because we like them better.

The three approaches of fingering–up, down and out–turn human beings into inferior, superstitious, vindictive souls.

The key to ProbThree–“it’s not my fault”–is to use your finger to point IN–not to create fault, but rather, to find your own definition of responsibility.

Here is my rendition of responsibility:

A. I have ability

B. I have problems

I will never be happy if I focus on one of those more than the other. If I only tout my abilities, I look like a jerk when it becomes obvious that I’m lugging baggage around. And if I only lament my problems, I become the buzz kill that turns every party into a departure gate at an airport.

It’s the blending of the two that creates responsibility. And responsibility allows me to point at myself without feeling the need to be guilty and faulty. Here’s how it works: I use my ability to help my problems and I use my problems to enhance my abilities.

Without abilities I wouldn’t have any way of addressing the problems that come up or possess the confidence to conquer. But I have to understand that if I never have a problem, I have no need to grow and increase my talents.

So every time I put the blame on God, Satan or others, I lose the capacity to become the beneficiary of a great life lesson. I also am admitting that I’m at the mercy of whatever I’ve fingered.

So ProbThree, “it’s not my fault,” is solved by the decision to point inward, taking responsibility and using my ability to solve my problems, knowing that my problems only enhance my abilities.

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