Jonathots Daily Blog
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It itches.
Even though no hives or rash sprout on the skin, adolescence produces an aggravation in the emotions, spirit and mind that makes you want to scratch. It is frustrating and without remedy.
Stop being teachers and instead, become shining examples and show what you desire instead of incessantly explaining it.
Children are not teachable between the ages of twelve and fifteen. Their ears have grown dull through years of public education, inundated by often-meaningless media, and are so accustomed to your voice that they hear a “Peanuts-cartoon honking” instead of actual words.
A quiet rebellion has begun. It will sprout external symptoms if you do not address that festering within.
Your children are questioning three things:
- Authority. Who are you to tell me what to do?
- Spirituality. Where is this person you call God?
- Individuality. Why should I be different from anybody else?
No seminar or book will address this brewing storm. They need you to show them something.
First, show them empathy and gratitude. Avoid becoming defensive. They are questioning authority–therefore, show them how the power of the human voice and the good will of hard work can overcome stupidity and laziness.
The purpose of authority is to get things done. It is not to establish a power base. Once you show them that, it will begin to resound in their beings.
Secondly, please don’t tell your children to go to church because “God requires their worship.” Show them that God is a Father, interested in everything they do.
If you do not teach your children that God is their Father, they will turn Him into a banker. In other words, when they need something, they will ask for a loan, but most of the time they’ll avoid Him because they’re behind on their payments.
And finally, instill in them the power of individuality. Show them how empathy and gratitude are easier than trying to solve impossible problems because we failed to recognize human need or we have denied the opportunity to be grateful for the kindness bestowed upon us.
Warning: you will have the inclination to lecture or have “sit-downs” with your child at this age.
It is a horrible mistake. Don’t be authoritative. Show them the value of good planning.
Don’t be religious. Give them a God who is their Father.
And let them know the contentment that comes from being an individual in a world of sheep. Demonstrate in your own life how to express empathy and gratitude for the opportunities provided.
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